it's mistake after mistake

goodbye!

2009-06-09T08:58:00.000+08:00

movedd. ask me for the new url if u are interested (:

I don't know anymore.

2009-05-10T22:49:00.002+08:00

2nd Sunday of May, so yea HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!
i love my mum! haha. celebrated it yesterday by giving my family a dinner treat at sakae sushi! ordered quite a bit la, but not too expensive for me still :P den went round looking around and bought a simple dress for my cousin's wedding at end may. haha am looking forward to it! (:

friday night out with stella was great too! poor her just recovered from stomach flu ahh :( so she's been eating plain food for the past few days, so friday we indulged in korean food! at a restaurant-like place at suntec city. hope u are better now gurl! :) caught up with her alot over dinner; havent seen her in ages! so i glad that we met up! take care yea!

msn-ing with nigo and kz over the weekend was :) too. maybe i miss them! LOL. anw quite interesting to hear their stories and rants of how they are being tortured, and the subsequent degrading of the F-A-S (reversed). haha!

so today i slacked at home. haha. but i went swimming finally! after a long long long time. haha serious k :P swam for like 1 hour in the late afternoon. better than nothing la hor x) heh

and oh! hope to learn jap with stella!

stella says i get paranoid easily; nigo says i think too much.
i hope they are true.
meanwhile, i'll try hard to keep my faith in you... :)
but it's hard, cos it feels as though i don't know you anymore.

bright bright sun shiny day (:

2009-05-06T22:40:00.004+08:00

went to watch 17 Again with sarah, shu zhen and clare at gv vivo yesterday! haha the show's not bad, quite interesting in fact. and zac efron's acting was not that bad la. lol. caught up with one another a bit before and after the show, which amounts to not much actually, but at least better than nth right. haha. nevertheless, it's great chilling out and relaxing after a day's work (:

anw, i did it (: TG from the bottom of my heart (:

and yesterday, i came across a meaningful song while practising singing the graduation songs with the K2 class. thought i might share it with u all (:

if u are sad/unhappy/distressed, hang in there, cos' yr rainbow will appear soon (:

labour day outing :)

2009-05-02T22:08:00.004+08:00

okay, class outing at sentosa was quite fun la i hope. haha though the picnic was erm not very successful, but it's ok x) den again, it was quite badly planned la =/ haiz. anw the sun was shining down real hard, such that walking on the sand barefooted was unbearable. lol, and i actually kept worrying it would rain, how silly -.- anw, did quite a bit of catching up with the girls, hearing stories and asking bout uni apps here and there. while hearing the guys go on and on with ns and ns and ns. lol. chatted a bit with the others like kz but din get a chance to chat with nic goh. and he doesn't care la. tsk. oh well.

so it's the start of may! why so fast! :(

anw i got accepted into nus fos! haha, like finally. now have to submit the acceptance form and other admin stuff. dunno if i should go for the science camp leh. ahh see how.

and i dunno when i should stop work. ahhh so undecided. lol

btw to my dearest guit juniors: u all did awesome, no matter wat! proud of u guys :)

people change, but i guess i have to keep believing and having faith...

feels good to be not working!

2009-04-21T14:45:00.000+08:00

albeit just for 1 day, haha xP

___________________

so i took a day off today to attend to something in the morning. faltered a little at some questions, didn't say some things and stuff like that, but overall it was okay i guess. a tad more confident then the previous time, lol. but since it is relative, it's hard to say whether i fared well or not. oh well, shall just keep my fingers crossed and await for (good) news 2 weeks later. still, i thank God for pulling me through it :)

have not been blogging much lately. too busy? too lazy? haha maybe a mixture of both.

anyway, it is Ben & Jerry's free cone day today! and since i soo happen not to be working, i went to queue up for the free ice cream of course! haha, i chose the new flavour - chocolate macademia - which was pretty refreshing and absolutely delicious. the macademia nuts are chocolate-coated, so as you bite on it, it gives a first sweet, then salty taste, and later a mixture of both. lol. the base ice cream - a mixture of chocolate and vanilla i think, goes pretty well with the macademia nuts as well. and so, i enjoyed licking up my cone of chocolate macademia, which made the longg wait worth it! haha okay, not that i waited very long. i went to the branch at raffles city, and started queuing at like 15 min before 12. LOL. but the queue then was already snaking! talk about kiasuism man. haha. so i waited oh-so-patiently in my high heels, no choice :P

__________________________

ok, enough about free ice cream (ie, enough of portraying myself as a glutton) ahahaha. shall do a journal entry about last week.

hmm ok let's see..

celebrated evelyn's birthday at holland v last thursday! it was together with some of her close friends, and her parents! so all of us were treated to a fantabulous dinner at Thai Express, delicious chocolate cheese cake from NYDC, and a soothing drink at the Roof Terrace Cafe (one which i didn't know existed -.-) ok, apart from the awesome dinner (told you i was a glutton! haha), i also spent a great time with the whole bunch of them! we all had fun talking, chit-chating, gossiping and reminiscing, especially under the starry night ;) so yup, it was great! and once again,
HAPPY B'DAY EVELYN! - 16/4/09

on sat morning, went together with kellie to YMCA as a volunteer to help out with the YFC selection interview. was assigned the duty of a timer. haha, it's not as easy as it sounds okay! :P anyway, while timing, i also listened some teams presentng their proposals now and then. some were good, some were average, some were just bad. lol. well, i still had much fun doing it! and yea, not to forget chatting session with kellie after that! :) went home at bout 2, with the sun scorching down on me like nobody's business -.- had to resort to using my umbrella, which actually does not really help, since it is made of the kind of translucent material that allow light rays to still pass through, and hence it is unable to divert the uv-filled light away from me and my face. zzz. ah, oh well. i guess it's time for me to strike of the (mis)conception that umbrellas are only associated with rainy weathers. haha :P

then on sunday night, it was 4C2 class gathering! it's good to see all of them again, but ya we are still pretty divided in that sense. oh well. still an awesome class in any sense :) anyway, i finally saw sarah low yan ping after i don't know how freaking long! LOL. if i were to look at her from toe to head, i would have definitely not recognise her! haha, u will understand if u understand x) at last she's able to meet up with us and go out with us! am relieved to know that she's much beter now, and that she's still the funny and cheeky girl i know. haha, great time catching up with her and talking to shuzhen and hazimah as well :) looking forward to seeing her (and emily too) again! :)

so at least last week kept me busy and occupied! haha

________________________

yesterday was the 20th April 2009..

just wanna wish JAMIE and HAZIMAH

a HAPPY 19TH BIRTHDAY!! =D

may your 19th year be as awesome as ever!

hmm, i seem to know quite a few april babies. haha.

_________________________

okk, other than that, been pretty much busy with work, and entertaining myself with the kids at the same time. haha. slowly building a rapport with kids, in general. anyway yest was very funny, sweet in that sense :) so before going home, one of the boys, christian, (whom i scolded teasingly earlier on) said: ms amy, i love you! ahahahaha, how sweet! and another girl said i was very nice! ahahaha, feels good to be praised ( even though it's by little kids :P) sometimes, the kids are a fun bunch to work with la, can't deny that. if you minus the fact they tend to drive me crazy sometimes :P

in the meantime, missing the missing i guess. haha :)

i don't expect much :)

2009-04-05T20:25:00.003+08:00

this week has been great too!

- farewell dinner for colleagues who are entering poly soon.
- movie+dinner with great company and amusement! haha ;)
- K2 Concert!
- class gathering!

and so, i am :) haha

work-wise, things are fine too. playing with and teasing the little kids arethe best parts of it :P been helping out with the K2 concert preparation this week, and the concert itself was pretty!!haha anyway, next week is the easter holidays, for 1 week! which means no school for the them, but there's still work for me! lol, gonna have to do some other stuff.

okay, time is passing very fast. gonna miss some people very soon. haha sianzxzx

great week =)

2009-03-28T22:07:00.004+08:00

and i don't get this often! haha

wed:
went back nj for guitar again :) this time with caiyun, and met some seniors there too! haha debby is still the same old debby! (no lawyer look yet hehe) chatted a bit with them, den listened to their comments for the ensemble, which i find rather useful and applicable, hopefully the ensemble really take them seriously. listened to juniors grouses abt playing the same 2 songs over and over again and how mundane/ boring/ stagnant practices have become (which reminded me of my syf days, lol) ah well can't be helped, that's syf for everybody. jiayou k ppl :) just 1 more mth! and dinner another day k, debby! haha :)

thurs:
the day i went broke. LOL. ok la, not really. treated kz to dinner and ice cream after work. lousy me lost my bet, so i owed him a treat. haha. but still, i am nice right :) ahahahaha. dined at yoshi first (his idea of helping me save money, when it is more of saving tummy space for ice cream -.- lol) den went to swensens for ice cream. sinfully delicious (what to do, haha) anw half the time he was sms-ing la. i know i am boring la k. lol.

fri:
took a day off from work to go play mahjong! (talk about being broke eh, ahaha) played with jamie, mar and nic goh at jamie's house. quite a noob at it la, but i still won! lol but not using real money la. den when mar left, it was still early, so we played the 3 player one our style! LOL, quite fun also la. jamie fed us with food too! haha thx girl :) after mahjong, it was still early, so went amk hub to play a little of arcade with nic goh. bad choice, cos i jus wasted his money since i suck at it. ahahaha. den he went home, and i went to meet stella for the networking session. it was pretty informative, and i guess i have to be mentally prepared for the road ahead.

today:
audition-ed in the early early morning. haha not crazy dun worry ;) slept. went library in the afternoon to pay my fines LOL. borrowed 2 general ref books. all the good fiction books are on loan, as always. ok la, not that i have any books on mind anyway. haha.

so ya, had a great week! :)

and yea, hang on sarah low!

hmm, sometimes, i think i read into things too much...
but somehow i have got this weird feeling that u are putting on a facade.
and yet, there's nothing that i can do about it.
and it sucks.
but if it's true, and if u consider me as a friend,
help me help u.

holland village!

2009-03-22T20:50:00.005+08:00

met evelyn for dinner on friday night, at guess where??

LOL Holland Village!
soo near where i live haha.

anw we went to this ipoh hor fan restaurant to eat. and i dunno why i ate curry chicken noodles instead lol. chatted with her over dinner, and helped her with some maths qns. which i wasn't much of a help actually. haha x)

after dinner, went for a walk around hv. to show evelyn just how, erm, interesting it is. HAHA. ok la, even though i stay near hv, i haven't really explored the whole of it yet. went to the 2 shopping centres first, where most shops are already close (even though it was just 7 plus). den went to cold storage (it's tt interesting, see) haha. den it was still early, so headed to some of the branching lanes (no idea wat to call that). along 1 lane, there are alot of different restaurants (like really, it's a food haven). haha, some of which i didn't even know existed O.O so it's a great place for dining and chilling out afterwards. den the other lane got like pubs and bars and stuff, with lots of foriegners. continued walking around a little after that, nth much la. den went for a last stroll in cold storage (it's 24 hours u noe ahahah). den sent evelyn home on her bus! haha :) ok la, still had a fun time, although i am jus more convinced at how interesting it is, man. haha.

ok, my weekends have jus come and gone. soo fast. work tml again! haha. but next week gonna be fun though, i hope! :)

'Cause nobody wants to be the last one there
'Cause everyone wants to feel like someone cares
Someone to love with my life in their hands
There's gotta be somebody for me like that
'Cause nobody wants to do it on their own
And everyone wants to know they're not alone
There's somebody else that feels the same somewhere
There's gotta be somebody for me out there

stay happy! :)

ooo la laaaa ~

2009-03-14T22:14:00.007+08:00

i am updating, finally. haha.

results are soo yesterday. my grades are, well, average. decent enough to get into the course i want, which is not all that competitive though, considering that i am applying for enrolment in the faculty of science at nus. haha, but i am still thankful for my results, for it could have been much worse. so ya, i am satisfied :) no regrets for one, as i really did put in my utmost effort in preparing for it, although time was a little tight then. however, i am a little puzzled at how cambridge markers mark and grade the scripts. haha, just weird. anyway, congrats to my friends who did well too! :) and to the dearest ones that didn't, i will pray hope wish that you can get into your desired course, and from there, just forget that A levels ever existed. heh ;)

the next important thing after results would be applications to universities. did not have much of a headache deciding which course i want, as i had already sort of made up my mind to undertake a degree relating to maths, since like 6 months ago or so. and now, i am still pretty keen on it. not really interested in other courses, except maybe psychology or statistics (lol). i considered business too, but i don't really find it interesting. law and medicine are my past ambitions, but my grades will deem me ineligible, even if i want have a go at it now. ahaha. ok so, my desired course now would be Applied Mathematics at NUS FOS. and contrary to what many think, i do not aim to be a math teacher! lol, i can enter other professions you know. i am thinking of actuary actually. haha, if not, i will just apply my maths to other fields. lol, i make it sound so simple -.-

visited smu open house last week. haha, for fun, and to accompany stella :) attended some talks, visited booths, blah blah. didn't get a chance to explore the whole campus though, cos it was raining, resulting in the campus tour being kept on postponed indefinitely -.- ended up getting stuck at the admission building. haha. then i went for nus open house earlier today (when everybody is at ntu, i choose to think) lol. almost went alone, but went with NG instead and met his friend (my ex pri sch classmate) TK. i still remember him, though he doesn't. zzz. haha. anyway, attended the talks, which were quite boring. went straight to the maths booth at FOS, and asked a few questions. walked around a little. blah blah. then met evelyn and her ac seniors for dinner. ok la, chatted with them a bit, nice people :) caught up a little with evelyn too :)

ok anyway, i finally went back to guitar to visit! haha, it's been sooo longg. heh. heard them playing their 2 syf pieces, and it was not bad la. haha :) in fact, i am impressed that all of them memorised their score! haha coolness, since the fingering and notes are not all that easy. talked to some of the juniors, and ya, it's great seeing them again :)

went for free nus genus concert yest night with ex guit mates. haha. it was not too bad, revolving around japanese themes. of all the songs, i like the song 'part of your world' best! lovely song! the 2 songs put up by the niborii ensemble were also great! haha, genus mayy be my future cca! see how it goes ;)

other than that, it's work work and work. not too bad, still working with kids. my kid got his own shadow teacher already, so now i am more or less a relief teacher covering classes for assistant teachers. got to go to different classes, which means working with different lead teachers, which means having to remember more names of kids. lol, a test of my memory.

on a side note, facebook is flooding my mail even more so now -.-

and it became more awkward =/
maybe i regret
everything i said
no way to take it all back...

~~maybe i'm just an overreacting piece of shit.~~

but how could you even act nonchalent to it all?
when i am struggling with this facade i put up, trying to shrug of everything as though i can't be bothered, when it is actually causing me so much discomfort.
now, i am fully convinced that things can't go back to normal.
there is too much awkwardness, embarassment, regret, resentment and i don't know what else between us.
yet, i still have to face you, acting as though it was just all a big joke then.

~~god, how when why did things even turn out like that? :(~~

~~how i wish i could believe nic goh, believe that i could turn back time...~~

but then again, maybe, subconsciously, i wish that i could just do it my way.

another weekly update.

2009-03-01T22:02:00.003+08:00

this is to avoid incoherence in my post. so i am listing one by one. haha.

1) happy birthday, mummy!

2) i received my 2nd pay on friday (:

3) i got myself a haircut.

4) on wed after work, went to visit kellie at the jap restaurant she's working at with stella and waileng. we were (almost) lost. LOL, we were like soo relieved when we finally found the place. turned out that we were either looking in the wrong direction, or we had had our eyes plastered with stamps such that we missed out on 1 big indicator. haha. anw i had a nice and delicous bowl of ramen, charsiew with miso soup. yum! caught up on alot with both of them, and saw the professional side of kellie. haha. all in all, had a great night (:

5) i almost lied/ feigned ignorance to cover my mistakes twice! \

first occasion: i was supposed to bring the class down to forest playground, and i wasn't very sure where, but i didn't want to ask the teacher (trying to be smart aleck, haha) okk, so what happened was i took the longer route. after walking for a while, i turned around to check on them, only to realise that more than half of the kids were gone! lol, u bet i panicked a little. we're talking about kindy kids here, no joke. ok, so i hastily retraced the route i took. couldn't find them. so i went back to class to find the teacher. told her half the class was missing. jus imagine the somewhat look of horror/shock on her face. opps. then here comes the test of my character:
her: which way did you go? down this way? (referring to the route which i didn't take)
(i was like omg, i took the wrong route. ok, so i was thinking, could i say yes, could i say yes? shit, what will happen if i say no? lol) after thinking for what i would reckon 1-2 seconds,
me: oh no. i went this way (pointing towards the route i took)
phew! at that moment, i was quite glad that i didn't lie. lol.
anw, guess what? the missing kids were at the playground alr. apparently one of the kids knew the place and she just did not follow my lead and went off herself, with the others behind her following. lol, and she got a scolding by the teacher! oh my, i felt kinda bad. haha

second occasion: a rather michievious boy asked me for permission to visit the toilet to wash his hands after snack, and i granted him permission.
mrs G: who's food stuff are these, not cleared?
me: oh, it's J's. (we call him J, no idea why) he went to the toilet.
mrs G: again! without permission! mrs C, J went to the toiler again without asking permission.
me: (lol great, i granted him permission. but i kept at that instance)
mrs C: *shakes head* you see, he never learns! always not listening to instructions, and doing things on his own.
me: (oh my, u better say it) oh, actually he asked me for permission, and i let him go.
phew again! anw, i found out that J has behavourial problems, so the teachers are rather particular about him being in the toilet (he plays in the toilet, along that line)

ok, in both instances, i wasn't scolded. quite thankful that i didn't lie (in the end), although i did comtemplate doing it. think it's because i am not used to making mistakes, so i never really had to admit to one. lol. guess i am learning now. being a person with integrity, yea!

6) when Pranav crys, he is inconsolable. he's becoming more temperamental. he cried twice; once cos he wasn't allowed to swim (down with bad cold. and he's still in sch?! lol) the other because he wasn't given a lollipop. think a special needs specialist is coming down to observe him tml.

7) had book character parade in kindy on thurs! cos it was book week, haha. all the kids came dressed up in their favourite book character. and yes, u bet they were all very cute and adorable!

ok, work tml again.

FRIDAY!

about kids (=work) haha!

2009-02-21T23:12:00.000+08:00

another week has passed by, again! oh my, it's really fast!

soon, A's results would be out! haha. been hearing rumours about the release date from friends around, but no 2 that actually corroborate each other. lol funny. not really worried about it now though (but it's not that i am confident!!) haha, i guess need the official announcement of the release date from MOE before i can feel the apprehension of receiving my results. haha. okay, i think it will either be out next week or next next week. a friday, most likely.

this week at work was fun but tiring, amusing but exasperating, at the same time. haha. was attached to my kindy kid again. he's called Pranav. his behaviour, well, fluctuates a lot. sometimes i find him okay, like he can talk (sensibly), he has knowledge that is acceptable of five year old, he knows what is happening around him. but then again, he's easily distracted and loses focus easily (and it becomes hard to communicate with him), he needs personal attention and instructions, and at times, he just venture into a dissociated state of his own. hmm, so i guess he just need some professional therapy early, and he would turn out alright :) anyway, when he's okay, he quite cute to talk too. haha, even though sometimes i don't get what is he saying x) and he's clever in his own sense too! like on friday, the zipper thingy on his bag dropped (partially my fault, haha). and i thought he wouldn't notice, but then, he started crying! LOL. so i quickly pacify him, saying i would go fix it. so i went to the teacher, who helped taped it back. after some time, it came out again! and he got sad, so i said i would fix it back (which i didn't LOL). then at the end of the day, i thought he would have forgotten about it (it's just a zipper thingy, u noe, haha), but no! he didn't, and started asking for it. so i took it out the detached part and told him to ask his mummy to fix it. he sort of understood, and then relented. hahaha. prove that u just can't fool a kid!

besides him, the other kids are also interesting in their own ways. since it's an international school, so the kids there are from various nationalities. and yar, despite the difference in language and culture, they still get along quite well, which is pretty cool! after having been through 1 week of their school, i must say they are privileged kids (of rich expats, haha). during curriculum time, they have learning centres in air-conditioned class (writing, numbers, drawing, art), go for playground time, swimming lesson, music lesson, library, and mandarin lessons as well. haha, interesting. during learning time, they have like lots of resources and toys that are cool and interesting! oh my, they even have a resource room, for that matter. and i have in there for duty as well, helping teachers to check in and out the resources. and the room is like filled with all sorts of different resources. lol, real cool. and i can't help but playing those sometimes too. LOL. anyway after school, enrichment classes are offered too, and some kids even signed up for like more than 1 O.O . they have like ballet, drama, hindi, keyboard, soccer (i was amazed to see them dressed soccer jerseys, pants, and shoes, like omg, haha) lucky or not, idk.

so that's kindergarten school for them. haha. and oh ya, they started to address me as ms amy already. haha. the girls are mostly obedient, very easy to handle and talk to. it is the boys that are oh my tian naughty. at least majority of them. they will just repeat whatever u tell them not to do -.- scolding and threatening works to a small extent only. as a result, i have been shouting quite a bit, and i think it caused me to lose my voice partially now. thought it was a sore throat initially, but luckily not. but still, argh. haha.

and oh, i realised something interesting about them!
they love to complain about their friends alot! like
"ms ___ , philip pushed me."
"ms ___ , miguel is not standing in his special spot."
"ms ___ , vivian is not sharing the tricycle."
lol, do all kids love to rat out their friends that much? haha

but then again, maybe that's wat makes them cute as well :)

and yea, i am still trying to understand their way of thinking. haha

ok, i have just ranted a long post abt my work. lol. nth else to blog about.

no social life lar lol. nvm, next week will be better :)

oh, and i need retail therapy. i finished reading nineteen minutes by jodi picoult too, so i need a new book as well. gah.

reminder to self: change :)

happy valentine's day! =)

2009-02-14T23:15:00.000+08:00

just another ordinary day of singlehood. ahahahaha.

well, wishing all my besties a happy valentine's day! luv u all always! (:

and OHH, i am NOT talking to nigo and kz alr. can't believed they bluffed me. so much for regarding them as great friends. haha tsk.

anw, work this week was okay; find time to be passing very fast! lol. hmm, as there is nothing much to do in the office, my job scope has changed again! and i was only just getting used to my office job, lol! i am still in the kindergarten departemnt, just that now, i can get into direct contact with the kindy kids! i am sort of required to cover classes for teachers who are absent (the priority), if not i am actually supposed to monitor a problem kid.

hmm, problem kid sounds wrong; just a boy with some developmental problem i guess. after being with him for 2 days, and listening to the teachers' comments about him, he really do seem do have some problem/s la. have to wait for the school to allocate a shadow teacher to him to really know what is wrong. but till then, i am 'attached' to him, and hopefully i can try to understand him more, and find out that he's fine afterall. yeah :)

actually, i can't believe that i am working with kids now! i loveee kids very much! haha. but i am seeing them in a new light now, though. they can get very naughty, and i had to shout at them at times. lol! nvm, kids are kids, their cuteness far compensates for anything. haha.

on a side note, my best meal this week was sakae sushi with work pals for dinner, friday night. it was soo impromptu. haha. and we bought roses to give to each other in celebration of valentine's day. how silly of us x)

i dunno why am i still avoiding you, even afraid of starting an msn convo with you. i have truely gotten over it, but i could only do it at the expense of our friendship, i realised. and i guess, there's nothing i can do to salvage this friendship now. it's too late, i faltered, u faltered. time has only made the barrier even thicker, even more impenetrable; awkardness and oblivion is all that's left.

sorry, for letting our friendship fade.
sorry, for all the heartfelt words that i penned down then, that may seem fake to you now.
sorry, for my utter lack of courage.

forgive me.

and i am hurting, because i know i have gave up and thus lost i a truely good friend.

time for an update

2009-02-07T21:51:00.006+08:00

i only update my blog once a week now eh? so much for being free and complaining of boredom. haha guess there wasn't time, like proper blogging time, like now x)

shall start off with last friday! had a date with stella yo! haha, we met up after work at Marina Square, as we wanted to take a walk along River Hongbao. dined at swensens for dinner, and yar, it was satisfaction factor before price :P nevermind, 'cos i received my first pay cheque on that day! haha, it's pro-rated la, which means i only receive about half a month's of salary. haha, but it's okay (: caught up alot with her over dinner, and we shared our working experience thus far. quite interesting to hear some of her stories, haha. then after dinner, we set off in search of the exhibition area. lol, we were sort of lost? cos they was the chingay parade going on at the same time, so it was kind of confusing, haha. anyway chingay on that day felt so different live. not as exciting as on tv, hmm funny. after roaming about for a while, we managed to get there la. it wasn't that crowded as expected, to our surprise. but nah, no crowd better wat :P took some pretty photos of the exhibits there, with stella and i posing in some too. i am a failure at zi-pai though :P always end up cutting myself out of the pic, or stella. haha tsk. was never a cam-whore la, so can't blame me x) so we ended up requesting a few other people there to help us take. haha. speaking of pictures, i am supposed to send stella, which i haven't, even till 1 week later :P haha stella, if u are reading this, i will send it to u soon :)

some pics taken:

the entrance

in front of blossoms (i think)

posing with the horse (=us!)

a gigantic cow head! haha

uus! haha x)

God of Wealth!

ok, i started work at kindy this week. in other words, no more slacking, chatting on msn, and taking things easy while working. haha, ok it's not that bad as it sounds la, afterall work is more fun now :) i am mainly helping the secretary there. in other words, i am the assistant secretary? haha sounds cool eh. kidding :P this week was rather eventful, so it's a good start! anyway, this job will not get sian (for a newbie like me at least) because there are different tasks to handle everyday. even the same answering of phone calls is different because the messages relayed are different. lol. but not that i favour answering phone calls, haha 'cos some parents have accents that are hard to comprehend :P starting of with the easy stuff now, learning as i go. lots of things to remember. haha. trying to rmb the teachers names now! x)

anyway, this week the school is having it's cny celebration. haha, kindy children were supposed to come dressed in chinese ethnic outfits. and oh my tian! they are soooooo uber cute! haha x) was allowed to watch the lion dance performance put up, and took some photos with my phone.

lol.

and the next day, i went to watch the puppet show by the children and skit by teachers as well. haha cool! and i witnessed some office politics in action as well. more like i overheard, cos i was just outside the principal's office, and the door wasn't close! not my fault right? xP hehe. i thought of walking away, but was too kaypoh alr. it is also interesting to listen to the teachers conversation, haha they are 1 funny friendly bunch, thankfully :) etc etc

ok, i do miss my ex pals who are still scanning away. haha, but at least i still lunch with them :) haha and bethany wants my blog url, but i refuse to tell her :P anyway they are having fun la. got teabreak somemore! tsk! haha :P

ok now that my work is stable, i shall go do some v work maybe :) and i need to visit guitar lol!

prayers answered (:

2009-01-30T16:32:00.005+08:00

thank the cranes? (:

whatever it is, i hope they will continue to bless sarah (:

continue to stay strong on your road to recovery!

happy niu year!!

2009-01-28T13:04:00.002+08:00

have an ox-picious year people! =)

went around visiting for the past two days. great to see the relatives uncles aunties cousins nephews nieces again! haha, and not to forget the happy new year - collect hongbao routine :P pigged out on a lot of chinese new year goodies - pork floss roll (my fave!), kueh bualu, peanut puff/biscuit etc. bak gua and pineapple tarts are not on my list of faves haha. gambled a little too, been on a losing streak this time. haha, biggest win was during human jackpot. funny game. played only blackjack though. i wanna play mahjong, dai di, and bridge! haha x) kidding kidding

lots of conversations going on, and it gets very noisy at times. haha. my cousin is getting married this end may! woohoo! i lovee weddings! heh. anw, had a fun time playing with the little ones! super cute and adorable already, cannot stand it. haha. my favourite is Jyan, 5 years olds i think. he was super high yesterday! haha, he loves playing scissors paper stones, and came up with a water version?! haha. he can talk more now, so can communicate better also. ahh, i dun wan him to grow up! haha

my niece Clarice is very cute also. haha, she's fasinated by the dog, and goes around shouting 'baby where, where baby'. 2 years plus, thus her voice is very cute! i think the one that looks best is my cousin Andrew, 3 years old. he just gets cuter and cuter lol. just that he is quite antisocial lar, so can't play with him much.

children are just so cute!! haha my vocab is stuck at the word cute :P any other words that is synonymous to it?

met my cousin Matthew as well. hmm, didn't see him in a longg while. wanted to take a photo with him, but didn't get a chance too. didn't talk much either, like ask how's he doing and stuff. hope to see him again, this sat maybe.

ok, the festive period is like over already, even though it's only chu san. got lots of new year goodies left. lol. bring some to work? haha see how.

and oh guess wat! i was reliving my childhood just last week by watching the Lion King Series! i like totally forgot the story already. anw i love Lion King 1 and 2! awesome disney classics! the plot, characters, songs are all nice! and i realised it is only as you grow older, that you will understand the movie better, and when everything will make more sense. nonetheless, i should recommend it to the cute little ones! HAHA

shall share some nice music videos from the movie :)

Lion King 1 - Circle of Life

Lion King 1 - Can You Feel The Love Tonight

Lion King 2 - We Are One

1 week into work!

2009-01-24T16:28:00.002+08:00

started work at OFS this monday! and for the first time in my life, i'm officially working and earning my own pocket money! lol. am hoping now that i will receive my first pay at the end of the month. haha x)

anyway, work so far is rather ok la. this week i basically had to help out with archiving of the students' records. apparently, they wanted all the records to be digitalised (accessible via the database in computer), instead of having to draw out and refer to the hardcopy all the time. so we are tasked with the duty of scanning all the data, page by page, and save them in the computer. lol. and i think i scanned about 30/40 files this week? maybe more la, since i am soo hardworking (ahem :P) anyway, scanning is boring la, but it allows one to refer to other sources of entertainment while working! like chatting online on msn (esp with kz, he's working also, and chatting like me, haha), watching movies/drama online, playing games etc. while enjoying music from 98.7 FM streaming from the internet. haha, quite slack la. then everyday, have to go down for bus duty, leading the students onto the bus. this one i like. lol. hmm for a day, i was posted to the kindergarten office to help out the secretary there. learnt quite a bit of the job there. this one cannot slack, but is more interesting then scanning, albeit more stressful too. haha.

so that's 1 week of work for me! my collegues/friends are pretty nice people. easy to get along (about the same age), so good for me :) haha. then for lunch, we either lunch at canteen (only once this week), or dine outside. let's see. i lunched at the coffee club in taka (mon), food court at lucky plaza (tues), canteen (wed), long john silver at cine (thurs), food court at taka (fri). how interesting lol. haha i am amazed at how they find their way around orchard. i am still directionless when it comes to orchard. must start committing to memory manz.

yay! long holiday up ahead! and i only start work on thurs! we are almost done with the scanning of files. and i hope that we don't have to scan anymore! cos i am sick of the computer. lol! btw, the whole school uses mac desktops O.O

okk, chinese new year is coming up! going for reunion dinner later tonight with the paternal side of my family. which means i can't go for class dinner =/ ah well, bad timing.

ohh stella found a job at moe this week! and she started work already too! haha happy for her :)

Save You - Simple Plan

2009-01-14T00:18:00.004+08:00

Take a breath
I pull myself together
Just another step till I reach the door
You'll never know the way it tears me up inside to see you
I wish that I could tell you something
To take it all away

Sometimes I wish I could save you
And there're so many things that I want you to know
I won't give up till it's over
If it takes you forever I want you to know

When I hear your voice
It's drowning in a whisper
You're just skin and bones
There's nothing left to take
And no matter what I do I can't make you feel better
If only I could find the answer
To help me understand

Sometimes I wish I could save you
And there're so many things that I want you to know
I wont give up till it's over
If it takes you forever I want you to know

That if you fall, stumble down
I'll pick you up off the ground
If you lose faith in you
I'll give you strength to pull through
Tell me you won't give up cause I'll be waiting if you fall
Oh you know I'll be there for you

If only I could find the answer
To take it all away

Sometimes i wish i could save you
And there're so many things that I want you to know
I wont give up till it's over
If it takes you forever I want you to know
(Oh)
I wish I could save you
I want you to know
(Ohohh)
I wish I could save you (oh)

Hamsters =)

2009-01-09T23:03:00.007+08:00

my experience with the cutest and most lovely pet one can have! haha =)

(all pictures are from internet btw, 'cos either my photos then were taken with outdated phone cameras that do not have brains to connect to the computers, or that i didn't bother taking. haha)

-PART 1 -

i had my very first hamster when i was in p6/ sec 1 i think. hmm, it was a brown and white Syrian breed (male).

While my sister had the pure golden one (female)

So, being first time owners, we were elated! haha. my very first home for the 2 babies (ok, not literally) was one with a red plastice base (yes, my love for red started way back then) and a white painted coated aluminum grill like cage.

along with the cage were a yellow plastic running wheel, a yellow food bowl, and a plastic drinking bottle. other stuff bought include sawdust and food (those mixed kind i think, with nuts, dried vegetable, corn etc)

ok as for actual hamster-rearing, the biggest hurdle (i reckon) would be daring to touch and carry the hamster at ease. took me some time getting used to, and also for the hamster to get used to you! oh, and you will also have to get used to cleaning the cage! (especially troublesome when they do not cooperate, lol)

for me, i named my hamster 'Pebbles' =) can't remember what my sister named hers. anyway, i enjoy 'playing' with them! haha, it's like i would take pebbles out of the cage and let it enjoy a moment of being cage-free. opps x) stroking it, feeding it, sometimes even chatting to it! and as i became less afraid, i would cuddle it in my palms, and try to induce it to sleep. haha. sometimes playing with them cheer me up and help me relieve stress, so i would usually try to set aside some time to play with them.

now for some interesting stuff that i learnt from my first batch of hamsters.

1) haha, my very first impression of them (when i got to keep them personally that is) was that they are one greedy bunch! omg, the way they can stuff endless food in the pockets of their mouth is just unbelievable. they look like they have 2 big tumours in both cheeks! lolz

2) hamsters shit anywhere, anytime (ok, maybe not when they are sleeping), and sometimes they would 're-eat' their shit. gosh, was quite disgusted la. read up a bit online, and realised that it's their nature to consume their faeces, as it is still considered nutritious.

3) while they shit anywhere, they tend to unrinate at a fixed spot, normally at one of the corners. haha, at least they are a tad cleanliness-conscious.

4) they seem to eat almost anything. fresh veggie like cabbage, carrot, green leafy kinds also. fruits like apple, pear. staples like bread, biscuit. even junk food like potato chips! sheez, not at all fussy. lol. oh, i remembered there was a time when they had an overdose of carrots, and their shit turned out to be orange. o.o lol, poor guys.

5) hamsters cannot live without grinding their teeth. learnt again that this is to prevent their teeth from growing too long. so basically, they will climb up the cage, hang on it vertically, and start biting on the grills, producing the typical metallic sound, while at the same time chewing off the white paint (argh!) made my poor cage rusty. haha. and even after buying the grinding dough for them, they still continue eroding the grills, making them all rusty -.-

6) the toilet roll is actually a very cool playing toy for the hamsters. very, very fun! you can create a maze for it too with the rolls! haha, but it's a no no if they are afraid of the dark :P

7) hamsters love to escape. they seem to find the exploration of the world outside their home their greatest adventure. lol. it's like the moment you leave the cage unlocked, hah! out comes the adventurous hamsters! and while they are out enjoying their exploration, here i am having a headache trying to find them. haha same for my family members. it's like they can be missing for up to a day! don't understand why would they want to leave the comfort of their home. haha x)

ok, i shall recount more about the life journey of my two hamsters =)

hmm, initially when i first had them, i couldn't tell their sex. cos you know, they weren't mature yet x) haha. basically, gender can be differentiated by their, erm, buttocks? for males only, they will have 2 pink kidney shaped organs (?) at their buttocks. lol. i think it's for sperm production. anw, i realised that only after some time, when they grew older. haha.

as for the life of a hamster, i think it is at least more exciting that that of a fish or tortoise (used to keep them too, haha) besides eating and sleeping, they exercise quite a lot too! the running wheel is like one of their favourite form of entertainment cum source of keeping fit. hmm, they fight sometimes too, which is usually quite obvious from the squeaking sounds that result. and usually, it is the male that gets bullied! LOL. ok la, they may not be fighting, maybe it is their form of playing with each other as well.

ok, so after a few months of getting to know each other, and as they grew older, they fell in love and decided that it was time to have offsprings. in other words, they started mating! at first, i never knew that was how they mated. but after a while, their actions made a little more sense (bio in lower sec?) haha. and watching them mate make me feels as though i am intruding into their privacy. hah. don't think i should describe their mating process x)

they mated quite a few times i think. and apparently, the sperm did get to the egg, but i didn't realise it. so the female got pregnant la, and somehow i didn't like feel that her stomach was becoming bigger. so anyway, after some time, she gave birth! buttttt, the babyhamster was stillborn or something :( i still remember how it looks like. it was shaped like a kidney bean, and i could vaguely make out the eyes, hands and legs. ahhh so sad! i only saw one, but i'm sure she gave birth to more. but i think she ate them up! 'cos at that time, pebbles was still in the cage. or maybe pebbles ate them too! argh! but most likely the mother saw pebbles as a threat, and decided to eat up her kids to 'protect' them. quite sad :(

after the pregnancy, she was kind of weak and stuff. probably had some after pregnancy complications as well (i am guessing a lot, haha). her health deteriorated after some time, and like any life cycle, she passed on. (rip female one) :( that was casualty no. 1.

after that, pebbles was all alone on his own. i'm sure he must have been quite sad too. both living in the same home, he must have guessed his partner has left him. probably even knew that she wasn't going to make it. yea, so sad :(

so pebbles had to endure loneliness, being all alone.

butt, we decided to bring in another companion for him :) haha. and this one presented us with a huge shock, but was a pleasant surprise!

-END OF PART 1 -

my tale of the cute little furballs =)

i need a job!!!

2009-01-05T23:08:00.003+08:00

arghh. i am still unemployed :( recruit express is no good lar. lol.

someone employ me, please! =D

anw interview today was bad lar. no comments.

and i miss my 45 cents bus and mrt rides! suxxx

goodbye 2008, and hello 2009!

2009-01-01T12:00:00.000+08:00

happy new year!

hmm, i am not so sure if i want to enter into the year 2009. not that i have the choice, of course.

anw 2008 had been an eventful year...

as i search my short-term memory, in a somewhat chronological order, 2008

- started with anticipation (at the beginning of the year),
- got me feeling about something that i did not feel about before,
- made me feel at a loss of what to do (my dilemma),
- showed me that time flies like the wind (and so do fruit flies like banana),
- taught me that the biggest hurdle in my academic life would be the A levels,
- put my time management skills and priorities to the test,
- saw me busying myself with guitar concert preparations,
- allowed me to spend fun times with stella and wai leng during lap (which i dearly miss),
- teased me a little too much,
- got me feeling very distracted and confused over something,
- gave me 2 As,
- marked the first time (and also the last time) i failed napfa (how i ended up tearing -.-),
- saw me surviving through common tests,
- gave me a sweet, yet not so sweet 18th birthday,
- proved that guitar revolved around my life (june hols),
- made me shut down my blog temporarily,
- elated me with my first formal performance in public (guitar concert!),
- concluded that guitar is the first CCA that i truely belong to (seniors' farewell),
- led up to a disappointment,
- saw me grumbling and lamenting alot about stepping down late due to early prelims,
- caught me loving the library too much,
- tricked me into believing i could forget,
- saw me sitting for prelims,
- gave me mixed feelings during farewell assembly,
- made me study and study and study,
- built up to the ultimate 'A' levels,
- gave me a finally 'free' life,
- had grad night, which was a night worth remembering,
- got me realising that i will miss my beloved class,
- allowed me to go out more often with evelyn,
- gave me the opportunity to do more of my random stuff (haha),
- made me relieve in doing nothing,
- got me thinking that i am a coward,
- gave me a new breakthrough with cycling (lol),
- confirmed what an awesome class i have (christmas bbq),
- accused me of stoning too much (LOL, only sometimes lor),
- made me realise that i need to change,
- saw me welcoming 2009 at home (:

yup, so that's about the highlights of my year. or what that's impt anw. haha. not bad right, can remember all that has happened! haha, if only i had such a superb memory la -.- referred to my archives for reference actually x)

ok, it's time to review my sole new year resolution in 2008. haha yea, i still rmb it :P
from my archives, it says "not to do anything that i'll be regretful of in the future"
hmm, so did i fulfill it?

i figure that it is better not to think about it. afterall, regret is not something that i can gauge well. it's like, you must have a clear knowledge of all the outcomes of the various path you take, before you can truely say which is the best for you. but however, life is not a game; time cannot be reversed, and it cannot be replayed. i can't possibly say that i would be better off if i chose the other option, or if i made a different decision. so, thinking hard whether i am regretting anything or not is pointless. wrong or right decision, i shall just accept it and move on (: no regrets whatever. haha, so that concludes 2008 =D

2009 - a year of uncertainty, freedom and new experiences

it will be a great year no doubt. no longer have to go through school routine. haha x) but then, it means i need to find a job. which sucks, 'cos i haven't found one yet -.- i think i am contributing to singapore's unemployment rate of i dunno how many percent. lol. giving home tuition seems to be the only viable option now. meanwhile, i am still uncertain of which course i want to take in uni. sian.

nvm, on a brighter side, if i don't get a fixed 5 day work week job, it means i can partake in other stuff (: that's part of being free, u noe x) haha. so see how it goes i guess.

ok, new year resolution for 2009:
CHANGE (:

new year wishes:
1) for my family to stay healthy and happy always (:
2) for sarah to get better
3) to remain close to my frens (:
4) to have a great start in uni life!

ok, now i feel abit better about 2009. haha.

i'm sure it will be A HAPPY NEW YEAR! =D

class gathering! (:

2008-12-28T22:15:00.000+08:00

had bqq cum christmas celebration at lynette's condo yesterday night! company was great, food was great, and entertainment was even better! lol. had fun laughing away seeing the guys get dunked in the pool, and especially when the formed the alliance thingy! haha, omg i am so sadistic. tsk. anw after bbq, we celebrated dec birthdays with the class cum christmas home baked cake. haha cake with multiple meanings(: then had gift exchange! damn funny also, cos we opened it on the spot, like one by one, so can see all the 'cool' presents x) hah. yup so overall, it was a great night! (: thanks lynette for organising too!

btw, the guys gave the girls a farewell gift each too (: the notes were pretty personal, graduation video was filled with fond memories, and pda production videos just hilarious. lol. quite touched la :'( yup, so thanks for everything, and for bringing joy, fun and laughter to the class! (:

i heart 07S23! glad to be part of it, even though i am just a quiet girl x) haha
and i guess i will never forget this class (:

and once again, i hope that memories won't just stay as memories..

anw, i should able to cycle alr, so shouldn't be afraid anymore (: haha thanks to sensei for helping :P

and get well soon, sarah low!

early x'mas celebration!

2008-12-21T23:05:00.003+08:00

had an early christmas celebration with my family and relatives yesterday! haha it was quite enjoyable la. and my nephews and nieces basically stole the limelight for the day x) young children and toddlers are just so cute!! <3 them! jyan, jayden, clarice, evan :) oh, the pass-the-parcel game was so hilarious la! food was great too! haha.

anw christmas is coming up next week! hohoho

Ms Ng's Wedding! =)

2008-12-14T22:27:00.004+08:00

went for ms ng's church wedding at trinity christian centre today! haha it's my first church wedding btw! quite a unique and different experience actually, but pleasant nonetheless :) hmm, the wedding vows taken by ms ng and husband were one of extremes, and the concept of extremes was basically the centre of the whole solemnization ceremony. quite intriguing and provocative, i must say. anyway after the ceremony, proceeded for the reception. haha, the food was quite good x) then waited for our turn to photo-take with the beautiful bride and suave groom. haha. hope to get the group pictures soon!

well, may the power of love be with them for the rest of their lives(:

met quite a few 4C2 classmates there. haha, haven't seen them for a longgg time! glad it turned out alright actually! 'cos clare, praba, sarah couldn't make it in the end. lol. but i managed to catch up and socialise a bit i guess :)

took a picture with yihui and lynette! haha all 3 of us are classmates now! amazing eh? x)

oh, and i made a discovery today! the national day song that goes "on the 9th of august is a holiday; we don't have to go to school, we all can play; we are dressed in our best on this special day' hiphip hurray it's national day" right, it is actually invented by hpps and rgps! both schools celebrated national day together back then you see, before rgps moved and henry park colonised their plot of land. so if that was true, outsiders would not know the above song, which is just oh-too-familiar to me! LOL.

psy.chological int.erview tml. sian. hope it will turn out fine.

kettling! =D

2008-12-09T22:46:00.004+08:00

went christmas kettling with evelyn today! it's for the salvation army, and we volunteered to help out on one day, for two shifts, and that is TODAY! lol. the location chosen was causeway point (which both of us rarely go heh)

anw, reached woodlands a little late, only to realise with much frustration that the person-in-charge was later! -.- lol. was like waiting with evelyn at metro, then outside delifrance, then at metro again, due to confusions that arose as we desperately tried to make the pot and bells appear. haha so we only started at bout 12; and because we were doing the first shift from 11 to 1, we had help transporting and setting up the erm pot too. it's the stand which holds the pot actually. after setting up, we wore our aprons! which reads: i am a bell-ringer! woots! haha, and ring the bell we did! not as irritating as i thought it would be thankfully :)

heh. yup, then we awaited for kind passer-bys to donate, which was not as frequent as the ringing of the bells of course. you get what i mean yea x) so we thanked and wished every kind soul merry christmas, and gave them a artistic calender in return :) anw, our shortened 1 hour shift still felt quite long. lol! and not long after, yuanqing came to join us! kind her just returned from ocip not long ago. someday, i shall partake in 1 too! :) then, evelyn's friend came to join. haha, one weird and funny guy. after handing over to the lady for the next shift, went for lunch at mos burger. rice burger ftw! haha. ok most part of the lunch break, yuanqing and i were basically listening to evelyn and friend talking and criticising. LOL. but some stuff were quite interesting to know la :P haha.

ok then went back to relieve the lady for our next shift from 3 to 5. time passed faster this time, as we entertained ourselves with silly word games, and number games that we could not think of. lol. anw, the person was late again! so we ended our shift at bout 530. but then again, not really angry la. especially after the lady brought 2 kids to take over us. guess they are really short of volunteers for kettling =/ quite sad la. hmm, overall, today's kettling experience was great! fun actually! :) time well spent no doubt as well! :)

oh, as we were kettling, there was this old lady on wheelchair selling tissue papers nearby us. hmm, how should i phrase this.. i could empathise with her, and her plight. but the compassion was not there; like i did not purchase tissue paper from her. as compared to the other volunteer, who bought the tissue packets, in addition to buying bread from breadtalk for her! quite a few others bought tissue from her as well. oh man, i hope i am not heartless :( it just didn't feel right to help her, somehow. hmm..

so it's ring, ring, ring! :D
(pictures soon!)

ahh twilight, twilight, twilight! may the movie be even better than the book man!

reading the 3rd book eclipse now. trying to slowly savour it so that the fantasy won't end too soon x) lol. and my sis bought all four books. hah, saving me money and hassle :P

and no, it's not just any romance, fantasy story ;) it's so. much. more. yea. haha.

twilight!

and it's dec 18th btw! it got postponed a few mths back. bleagh. well, at least it's showing! :)

GRAD NIGHT' 08

2008-12-02T22:52:00.004+08:00

lights, camera, action - 1st december 2008 (:

ahh, what an awesome night! was kinda dreading it at first, but i glad it turned out alright =) hair and make up was nicely done (but must pay la duh :P) dinner was okay, didn't eat much though. and photo taking was blinding, with all the flash and stuff. fun part was the outing after prom! got changed into class tee and wandered around the vicinity (nvm if it's aimlessly, heh) stayed at macs for a while to grab a bite, and played cards. then left and after muchhh deliberation, we walked to espanade i think and rested at a platform area chatting, stoning, just enjoying the night. and it was like 4 plus before we headed back to the hotel room to wash up. some of us rested then, while i couldn't sleep (surprisingly) lol. and guess what, i managed to stay up for the whole night! was expecting to conk out early morn, but i managed not to! heh. anw left for home at bout 7, and slept from 8 to 12.30. haha. what a memorable night, really(:

lazy to upload photos :P all up on facebook anw, haha.

just 2 photos of my beloved class- 07S23 (:

now, i feel that i have really graduated from NJ. and suddenly, i feel quite sad :( how i wish memories are not just memories, but what you can relieve everyday of your life.

i truely wish and pray that the friendships forged can remain as strong as ever. even though i could feel some fading away already =/

people, keep in touch, please (:

updates

2008-11-30T22:23:00.002+08:00

outing with evelyn on monday was fun! (: talked alot alot. lol. caught the chiwawa movie, which is ok la (: den shopped a little and bought some prom stuff. so walk and walk, and talk and talk, until very tired. haha but it was worth it la (:

went back to school to help out during guitar on wed and fri. haha, on wed i was super slack, ended up chatting with bern and serene! lol :P so, guilty me promised to help (as in really help) out on fri. which i did! haha went over to guitar 1 and took over the role of SL cos their SLs are not around. haha sense of accomplishment man! :D but then, slacked qutie a bit after going through the mexicano song, where i started chitchatting with charleen. haha, but nvm, at least i did sth! lol! anw that's their last practice alr, no idea when i am going back again really =/ hmm

den went lynette's hse on thurs! had a sumptuous lunch: curry and prawn fritters. yum! haha. den we did what we had to do, and yea, great sense of accomplishment! :D

ok, and so it's another week! haha.

and it's grad nite tml! and class outing afterwards! haha hope it's fun!

okk, off to sleep to save up energy for tml nite (:

tag replies! (sorry for the late replies!) haha
nigo: ok wateva, u end up reading anw also right? :P and i wouldn't call that flying -.- lol
KzTay: u ah, rubbish la. i don't mind ppl reading la. it's jus that i have to know, that's all. lol. aiya, it's not trauma, it's called no guts. haha
stel: yup from 4C2, my classmate lo. ooo, so qiao! haha she very particular bout cleanliness right?
deb: haha thx! hope u are doing fine with yrs too! haha gotta move on! :P
yihui: haha ok la. ya at night cannot see much one :P but got entertainment cos i went during it's opening period i think. haha.
jennings: hiii! haha hope u recover soon! :)

i am still not blogging as frequently. lol.

getting used to being free! lol

2008-11-22T22:13:00.005+08:00

yoyoyo, still can't believe that it's all over! haha stale news, but nevertheless it's a huge relief! yea! haha, feels damn weird feeling so free really, heh not that i'm complaining of cos, of cos not! haha!

depsite lamenting bout aches and stuff, i still went for a walk/shop around vivo on wed tgt with van and lynette :P bout a few apparel as part of retail therapy. haha haven't shop since i dunno when! hmm explored almost like the whole gigantic mall! lol. den met the rest of the class for dinner after their sentosa outing. ohh the horrid rain spoilt the whole thing i guess =/ anw ate at the Mussel Guys, though none of us ate mussels! haha ironic eh. then splited after dinner, which was rather anti-climax in comparison to the previous outing, which jamie and i agreed upon. hmm, guess everyone's mood was sorta spoilt by the incessant rain ba. so i headed home, where i waited for eons for bus 61 to come with yihui. seriously, the bus took like forever to come, and when it came, the commuters at vivo boarded the bus and filled up the whole bus stop! like wth -.- not to mention we were both aching and tired, and still had to stand throughout the bus journey. stupid la. haha.

ok visited sarah yesterday together with clare and shu zhen. haven't seen them both for at least a year already o.o haha felt kidna awkward at first, but friends we are, we soon opened up and yea, became friends again! haha ok i don't make sense. anyway visited sarah in sgh. thank god that she's recovering well already; if all goes well, she should be discharged next week :) don't want to comment much here, but all i can say is that she has been a brave and strong girl all this while. the pain she is going through is probably what i can never understand, and she doesn't let it affect her disposition as well, continuously 'entertaining' us with her stories. ahhh, sarah low, must recover soon k! i know you will! (:

hmm, was chatting with nicholas goh last night on msn. quite surprise at his random initiation, even though he insists it's not. lol. but that's not the point of course. the point is, he is actually quite philosophical. not kidding, i got like enlightened by his words, though only momentarily. haha. which also reminds me, that kaizhong is also sometimes like that, making thoughtful comments now and then in sms-es. and in both cases, i would usually go "yea, true" lol. so i now boldly make a postulation that people who act lame are in fact far from lame in the mind. feel free to use mathematical induction to prove this statement true :P haha k joking of course.

hope to blog more frequently now! haha

\edit

omg. amazed and shocked at the same time, lol. thanks guys, really. motivating words, inspirational talk, life lessons. will keep it to heart. thanks again, if u are reading this. and if u are, tag!! (:

and so it has come to an end. finally.

2008-11-18T22:23:00.002+08:00

yup, A levels offically ends today (for us PCME-ers). and all i can say is that i am free, at long last. with a longgg awaited holiday for me to slowly enjoy and to make up all that i have lost. haha.

class outing today. went badminton at bishan complex. den lunch at pizza hut j8. den headed to jamie's house, where i had a few rounds of non-gambling like mahjong! lol. quite fun (: after leaving, walked around AMK hub with van and wendy. and now, my right arm and legs ache. LOL. so am not going for traditional sentosa outing tml =/ opps. and also because i haven't gotten over the cycling incident yet. haha.

so many things that i can/wanna do now! woots. shall do a list perhaps :) ahhh hope my holidays would be nicely filled, and that i won't have to fret over nothing to do! wat an irony. ahahhaa.

still surviving (:

2008-11-08T23:16:00.003+08:00

one week has passed!

ahhh, mixed feelings lol

gp is kinda screwed really =X the more i think about it, the more i think i am so gonna fail my essay >< so i decided that i shall not dwell on it anymore, at least till the rest of the papers are over. oh manz.

maths was okay(: not that easy, but doable at least.

can't say much for chem and paper 3; still left with paper 1 and 2. really hope both paper 2s will be okay, cos i am only gonna revise physics the morning before the paper in the afternoon, and chem the night before the morning paper the next day. blame econs, lol.

so econs next week back to back O.O kinda scared; hope i am studying it the right way =/

wish all luck for the rest of the papers!

oh and i like fanfan 范玮琪! her songs are nice(: haha k random.

farewell assembly...

2008-10-17T23:20:00.004+08:00

haven't been updating lately, as always. haha :P

anyway went back to school for farewell assembly today. last official day as an NJCian; brings about mixed feelings i guess. the assembly itself was quite a disappointment sadly (can't help but comparing with the one at crescent's, which was way better). there weren't chairs, which didn't matter to me at first, until my classmates kept commenting about it, then it struck me that hey, it does matter! lol. it's as though you are not being respected i think. as for the program itself, it was predominantly speeches. haha. but suyi made a speech, a heartwarming one which touched me somehow (: den after which, there was this farewell video. which was quite pathetic sadly. like random clips from everywhere, put together to get a rojak video. sorry if i sound unappreciative, but at least i'm being frank x) den coupled with other admin stuff -.- and received a graduation pin, plus a momento in celebration of the SEA. haha i like. now comes the best part :P reception at the linkway! ahahaha, am i greedy or am i greedy :P lol and farewell is just like that. and the main reason for not being satisfied? it's cos it doesn't like make you feel sad you know, about leaving. hmm...

after farewell, went around taking photos! haha :) i purposely brought a camera some more k!

took random pictures of people and of the school, in memory of my two years at NJ.

some pictures:

(ok, i dun look gd in the pics, but nvm x)

and i will miss 07S23 :'(

ok, so A's are in two weeks time. guess it's time we give it our all and strive for the best!

jiayou my friends! we can do it!

& thx stella for the note and cute clip ((:

and hey, i finally get to take a picture with you alone (:
wasn't my idea, but i'm still happy about it.
thanks for being so spontaneous though, though i was quite embarrassed!
(i know i shouldn't be, it's just a photo, right?)
haha anw, i am still glad i did in the end(:
it's just a photo, but it means a lot to me, somehow.
frenz4eva =)
but from how i reacted, i know i haven't got over you yet. no, not yet.

5 more weeks! =/

2008-09-26T23:23:00.002+08:00

haven't been updating lately. too lazy :P anw, got back all prelim results, except for econs case study. super slow la. lol. results are okay i guess, better than expected at least. buttt, can't get complacent of cos. now for the real thing, that's coming up in slightly more than 5 weeks time. or to be more exact, it's in 37 days times O.O wth, which means, no time already. lol. considering the amount of work we are given, and are expected to complete, in aid for our preparation for the big thing. that said, i shouldn't be complaining eh. haha nvm. i am crapping, as always.

lots of stuff to do, more to come i'm sure. argh. even a to-do list will not suffice. lol. and i always spend five minutes trying to decide what to do, which should be given higher priority and stuff. and what am i talking about? homework, practice papers, revision worksheets, for goodness sake. which means now they take up the priorities in my life >< sian

will be spending 2 more weeks in sch, before we go on study leave. working on restructured timetable again, so it's just sch for 3 days, and lib for another 3 days at times. sian, really. lol.

ok, enough of my mundane and boring life. =P

anw, upcoming next two days would be the long-anticipated F1 formula night race. heh, just watched a little of it on tv; practice drives round the tracks. hmm, doesn't seem that exciting actually. lol. maybe it's because the cars (are they called cars? lol) are driven singly, hence can't catch much action. maybe the next two days one would be more exciting! haha.

erm, just finished a book earlier this week. it's The Choice by Nicholas Sparks, one of my favourite authors :) it's a beautiful, sweet and moving novel, though it gets a little draggy at times. and i realised something. it is better if you read the words aloud in your mind, trying to picture the scene, the actions ,the conversation. this will inject life into the story and the words will strike you more strongly, which can then evoke more emotions and feelings from you. lol, that's what i feel at least :)

jiayou people!

认清了真心话, 你就放得下

i dunno =/

2008-09-14T21:58:00.002+08:00

kz told me something today, about you.

quite shocked actually.

could this be the reason for your actions...

or would it not have made any difference anyway...

maybe yes, maybe no.

i won't know, would i?

hmm, he said i changed you. did i really?
but it couldn't be...
i dunno...
why so complicated? :(

argh. soo much for not thinking too much ><

but it's a fine divide, soo soo fine.

this is not good

2008-09-13T23:16:00.002+08:00

i did something stupid today. at least i think did. sigh.

what's with me anyway. crap.

ended feeling horrible at home, when i could have spent time better outside. argh, and finding excuses to substantiate my stupid decision didn't help either ><

i guess i was afraid. afraid of falling into your trap, over again.

if it was some other person, i'm not sure if i would have done the same. perhaps not, cos' you are not just any other person.

i thought i have gotten over it, somehow. but i guess apparently not.

i conclude that i always think too much, always.

i know you just wanted to go out. i was free, and you knew it. which makes things worse.

i wanted to go actually, but i just can't. somehow, it didn't feel right.

so i'm sorry for being such an idiot, really, though you will not be reading this.

hopefully, you would not take this to heart.

and if there is a next time, i promise not to be the idiot i was today.

but still, whatever it is, i'm sorry.

meanwhile, i shall work towards taking things at face value, as what they are.
have to really stop thinking too much.
just give me a bit more time, and i'm sure i can get over it. :)

再零点零零一公里就可以清醒

Prelims are OVER =D

2008-09-12T23:29:00.005+08:00

yes, finally it's over and done with! and i can rest (again)! haha :P studying is really becoming a bore. sian. nvm, shall worry about that later, and just relax and enjoy now :) not gonna hit the books anytime soon (i hope!) although there are some people i know who are actually starting to study alr! like omgee!!

so the past few days have been pretty enjoyable i guess :) ended chem paper on wed, then went out with the class for lunch at cafe cartel plaza sing. oh man, we took ages (like seriously long la) to decide on where and what to eat. and we kept changing our minds too! but anw, we ended settled for cafe cartel, which could accomodate all of us (an amazing 23/24 were present), and which was within our budget (set lunch at just $9.50). haha, so you could consider it a class outing, although all we did was just have lunch together (though u can't consider it to be exactly together, cos we weren't exactly sitting together!) haha ok i know i don't make sense, but yarh.

At Cafe Cartel

anw after lunch, we basically went seperate ways - some girls took a long walk to suntec city, while the guys went i dunno where. lol. so did some window shopping at suntec and marina, nth much that i can remember though. then left for home for a good rest! haha but before that, i went to esplanade library in hope of borrowing some scores, only to realise (after spending a considerable amount of time finding what i wanted) that you could only borrow those if you have nlb premium membership, which apparently charges at $21 a year. ahh -.- what a letdown. although photocopying is allowed, but i did not have a cashcard with me, and have no intention to buy 1 either. so i left the library disappointingly, and a little frustratingly. haha nvm, at least i know now.

on thurs, some of the girls went shopping! haha, met up at far east plaza and we went to make holes in our purses! (ok poor use of words :P) anw, bought some stuff, but i still need more retail therapy! haha. at bout late afternoon, we went to vivo to join the guys for dinner. or rather, that was the original plan, but we ended eating first because our stomachs told us not to wait for the guys. haha :P so we went all the way to vivo to meet the guys for dinner, but ended up eating ourselves anw. haha ok to not sound so pointless, the class reunited at the rooftop! lol. and we played games - truth or dare, and shoot shag marry. haha, that night was really a long time since i had a good, hearty and stomach-hurting laugh. seeing the guys doing all the funny and as they call it - 'throw face' - dares, just can't help but laughing! but i really applaud them for their courage and spontaneity, in front of the public somemore! haha, if it were me, i would never have the guts to do all that man! anw, it's been a long time since the class did anything like this together, and hopefully is won't be the last!

At vivo :)

today, i went to someone's house with some other people to do someting special for somebody =D haha, quite proud of ourselves! den visited je lib after that. haha, to borrow some nice books this time :)

anw, HAPPY BIRTHDAY S.LOW! (09/11) hope your prelims results are ok!

okk, it's the weekend up ahead. hope to spend it well! i have got a feeling it's going to be one of the last few carefree days! haha =X

btw, read an email from mr yong earlier on. he said we (his classes) performed below expectations for physics. haha, like so expected la. (i hope against hope that i won't fail :S) but yea, i shan't dwell on it anymore. but the main point is, we won't get to relax for long :( lessons starts next week, following restructured timetable, but still... -.- and on top of that, there will be test! like !#$%^& haha. okok, i know it's for our own good, so i shall complain for only this once! :P anw, to quote him: "The more important 'gift' than talent that a person can possess, is the will to accomplish the impossible. All the way. Give your all for this lap, no matter you are way in front or way behind." yea, just give it our all, and whatever the outcome, at least there will be no regrets, knowing that we have already tried our very best =D

SO JIAYOUUU EVERYONE! GAMBATE!

to my dearest juniors who are busy preparing for their ip assessment week and promos, jiayou too!

sometimes, it all boils down to how we choose to perceive things.
and at times, we just think too much, and burden ourselves with redundant worries.
but then again, life is far from simple.
in fact, it's even more complexing than complex numbers.

haha.

& it's going to be a long post!

2008-08-31T17:00:00.001+08:00

ahhhhh, sooooo sooooooo long since i last updated i realised! lol. although it's only been less than a month, but somehow it just felt rather long. yet, i wonder then how it is possible that i feel time is passing way too fast at times. ah nvm, i am just contadicting myself -.-

okk and so the sept hols are here. butt it doesn't feel like the hols at all! must be the awful timing of the exams! haha. think it's cos of the many study days we had, that we did not have to go school, and i would end up studying with caiyun and yuping at je library. speaking of which, the library is really conducive for studying! although time seem to pass even faster in the lib! haha. anw prelims are quite screwed la -.- the only paper i felt was ok and am confident of is maths, the others are just crappy. just hope that i won't score that bad. haiz. anw, all is not lost for physics and chem, i think. still have paper 1 and 2 after hols to sit for. so i guess just have to work harder in hope of salvaging myself. ahahaha. butttt for now, it's time for a good and well deserved rest! been slacking off and doing things which i never found the time to do these few days. oh man, mugging really deprives one of all else -.-

so friday was teachers' day celebrations. went out after maths paper the day before with the girls to imm to grab some gifts from daiso! haha, we scoured the whole place and decided that we should just diy a board each for our lovely teachers using wooden ornaments, which turned out super pretty man! and i think we are super efficient too! like after buying the stuff and all, we sat down at this platform thingy and imm and started doing up the boards publicly. lol luckily there weren't many people around, otherwise we would have invited many stares from around! anw, we spent bout the rest of the afternoon piecing everything together, which is oh so fast la! haha, feel very proud of our final gifts! (not that i contributed to the artistic aspect la, since i am soo not artistic, but at least i helped out with the manual work =P)

so here's the boards which we went great lengths to make:

and as u can see, they are empty still. and the girls were joking about comparing the before and after looks of the boards, after referring to after the boards are filled with messages. cos once the guys write on it, their artistic handwriting would just beautify the boards completely. haha right. ok la just kidding =P afterall, i won't say my handwriting is all that good also (in fact, i think i need to really improve it la) haha tsk.

anw, the very next day, we wrote the msgs on early morning. and here's how the boards look like finally:

it didn't turn out all that bad afterall la =D just that i dun understand why the guys can't just choose an ink colour that matched the background colour better -.- while doing this, we skipped assembly and aces day workout. lol. only went for the concert, which i was highly expecting, but ended up to be quite a bore and disappointing. ended up ponning the concert with the class after we had to change venue due to the rain. and shockingly, some of the teachers even pon the concert la! lol, stupid. anw, presented the gifts to our beloved teachers, and took a pic with them! feel kinda sad actually. the thought of being on my own still scares me a little. and they will be the last memories of teachers i would have in my education phase i guess. and this will be the last teachers' day celeb too! haha, i am getting nolstagic. anw, to all the deserving teachers out there: HAPPY TEACHERS' DAY!!!

and after teachers day, went out for a mini girls outing with jamie, lynette, yi hui, wendy and vanessa at vivo. haha, finally got a chance to relax and shop around! (omg, i reall sound deprived, haha) good to have the carefree feeling back again after mugging so much for prelims the past weeks, and just lazing around and chatting without having to worry bout anything for once. seriously, can't wait for a levels to be over man! (though prelims are not even over yet la, haha). anw, i bought stuff and watched WALL-E. the movie was pretty good i guess, better than expected at least (we were joking bout why are we paying 8.50 to watch a cartoon that is :p) the plot was a little far fetch la, but it was actually quite touching, for a show mostly bout robots. and what's amazing is that even though there was hardly any talking where the robot scenes were concerned, but it still managed the convey the intended meaning and feelings of the robots, which was pretty cool. so no wonder the movie got such a high rating!

okk, i am rotting at home on a beautiful sunday afternoon, which i would most probably been trying to myself awake cramming in the past weeks. but, today i am soo energetic! haha, not a feeling of lethargy depsite sleeping early this morn! haha, and i conclude under amy's scientific research on sleepyness syndrome that studying no doubt puts you to sleep. so next time, when u can't fall asleep, just head for the books (must be those school text of cos), and i guarantee you would be knocked out ten times faster than if u had taken a sleeping pill! ahahaha. ok lame i noe.

feel kinda bored and restless now actually, like as studying was the main thing revolving around my life, and now that i am not studying, i am at a lost at what to do. lol no life la omg. but i am not a mugger k! haha. ok to not sound so pathetic, i played the guitar (trying out charleen's book, ha!) and missed playing the guitar loads, did a little of orgami (can't believe i actually bought the origami paper and book, haha), played the psp, and finished a rather thick book 'p.s. i love you' (quite ok, may catch the movie online later, haha), this weekend =D cool eh! haha. watched alot of tv as well; was glued to the hongkong serial shui yue feng yun this morning! haha, quite an interesting show (local tv shows really have to buck up ah) haha.

haha, suddenly my posts have so many pictures eh! the result of being too freeee. haha had better enjoy the remnants of my free life, before i return to the life of mugging. tsk. meanwhile, had been slacking around doing nothing much, yet still enjoying life. haha. it's a great, yet weird feeling. it's like u know u can relax, but yet can't go all out in relaxing, cos it seems over, but in fact, it is not over yet. haha what is this man. the administration is ingenious man. ha.

anw, been thinking bout some stuff lately. i think that sometimes, i have been too caught up with studies and other stuff that i have neglected my friends :( in fact, the only ones that i see regularly are my classmates, and perhaps cy and yp during our study sessions. haiz. on my juniors side, there's evelyn and yuanqing from cres (nice duo), and charleen, jennings, serene, clara, bern they all from guitar (miss them loads!). as for my fellow peers, there's stella, kellie and waileng (who are my best interact and lap mates), and sarah and emily (my best sec sch frens in ac now). and for seniors like debby whom i don't even see now :( and yea, me being an introvert and all, it's not like i have many friends, and in fact i don't. hence, my heart tells me i should go the extra mile to sustain the friendships that i already have, and not wait for them to slip out of my grasp. but yet, i just can't take the initiative somehow (not a very verbal person either, can only open up to those i am really close with). but who am i anw? at times, i am not even there when they need someone to tide them their low points. i am really a horrible friend i guess :( and at times, when i know they are feeling down, i can't even give them a good consolation, and the comforting words i can offer just sound soo unnatural and distant somehow. and yea, sometimes i can tell that they are putting on a facade, hiding behind their cheerful surface, but yet, there's nothing that i can do to help them, and i just can't help but feeling disappointed at myself. i did mention before that i must learn to treasure my friends more, even since i almost lost an impt friendship. but yet, i find myself doing the very same thing again, neglecting those around me. although this time, i am a little bit more proactive. but i guess it's not enough... i really don't know. i just hope that i am being over-sensitive, and that my worries are unfounded. reassurance, perhaps that's what i need.

okk, i have typed a pretty long post i realised, the result of cramming everthing into one post sia. haha. no idea when i will be back again =P

guitar seniors farewell! =)

2008-08-11T23:14:00.010+08:00

(p.s. haha finally have the time to complete my long overdue post =P hence the date up there!)

08/08/08

what a memorable day indeed(: and if it's not too late, just wanna say a BIG THANK YOU to all our juniors who managed to present this farewell to us, depsite under great time constraints. so yea, kudos to u all! thanks really, for rounding up our guitar life soo heartwarmingly :') will miss u all juniors and graduating seniors, and njguit, loads! <3

SL proud to be i guess =)

and may the pictures bring back fond memories of the times we had tgt (:

(sorry to those i did not have a chance to take a pic with; a regret certainly =/)

and yes! completed after soooo long. haha. but as the saying goes, better late than never eh =P

yes, an update! =D

2008-08-01T23:24:00.002+08:00

i'm finally squeezing in some time to update :P

time is really passing by like a mag-lev train man =X it felt like just yesterday when we had our concert. and speaking of which, concert at esplanade was awesome! we were great, the alumni were great, and the audience were great too! haha. anyway the period after the concert was still guitar filled. within a short span of about 1 week after the concert, we conducted EXCO interview over 2 days, and had EXCO election speech day yesterday! are we amazing or are we amazing?! haha jkjk. and today, we decided on the final new EXCO positions :D this therefore meant that the retiring exco (yes, sadly) would be stepping down on handover ceremony coming monday! ahh! i don't know how i should/ would feel =/ but i guess i will feel relieved (when the reality of prelims in two weeks sinks in finally), yet at the same time sad (afterall it officially marks the end of guitar for me).

have also been pretty busy the past week doing caal update on sps. it's super tedious, having to key in reflections for every single activity. submitted my 3 sgc write ups just. hope everything will get approved so i wouldn't have to make any changes :P haha

oh, this week marks the start of our restructured time table, where we don't have lessons on thurs and fri, so that we will have more time to study. haha, right..

ok, so prelims are in exactly 19 days as of today. i am scared :(

p.s.
we are good friends la! don't anyhow think ah u all (: haha

it's been a year...

2008-07-18T23:01:00.002+08:00

jennings reminded me of something today.

it's exactly a year since i took over as Guitar 3 Section Leader and became part of the 10 people strong EXCO. not that i'm stepping down yet, but it still officially marks 1 year of term i guess(:

over the past one year, many things happened, more than what i can remember. there were good, happy, enjoyable times, and there were also upsetting, stressful moments. but one can't have the best of both worlds, can he? so i won't remove those bad times from my memory, 'cos they will make me cherish those wonderful memories even more.

whether or not i had fulfilled my duties as an SL, i guess it is not for me to say. but, i really hope i did, although i am already disappointed in myself for just not putting in more effort to go the extra mile, as well as not carrying out a few promises which i made. oh wells =/ just hope that i had made a difference in the lives of my fellow members, as well as my other fellow guitarists.

and i must admit, guitar as cca by itself would not have been made possible without the passion and dedication of the guitarists. in fact, they are the ones that make me look forward to guitar practices, especially after a boring day of lessons. i would definitely miss them so much after seniors' farewell :(

now that 1 year has passed, i would say, now, that i do not regret applying and then stepping up as an SL. in fact, it enriches my guitar journey by 101% i'm sure. although sometimes, i tend to reflect over whether i had made the right choice, whether all that i'm doing is worth it, whether the sacrifices were worth it, but i kept reassuring myself that what i'm doing is right. and i'm glad i did; otherwise, i may just as well give up.

come to think of it, i think at least half of my jc life revolves around guitar. it's just amazing i guess(: guitar is life! haha

i love guitar((: really!

jiayou for esplanade concert!

today started off okay, then gradually my mood sank and sank (because of you!), butttt, it got lifted up (because of you again!), so i'm (= again.

somehow, i dunno how, u just made my day. (:

anw, feel so useless when i can't help u with your troubles, but don't worry too much yea? and seeing u so tired i xin tong :( must rest more! =)

(although u won't be reading this)

GUITAR CONCERT! =D

2008-07-12T21:54:00.004+08:00

concert was a blast! can't really believe it's over alr! i enjoyed myeself to the fullest, and i'm sure all of us did, including the audience(: we smiled to the music, we swayed with the music, and most of all, we felt the music in us; at least i did :D a big thank you to all who came down to support us, and me! haha.

to jamie, yi hui, stella, wai leng, evelyn and yuanqing, thanks for cheering for me during the concert, and for your beautiful roses and lovely messages(: really appreciate your presence there(: <3 ya loads! glad you all enjoyed youself at the concert!

(haha, i realised i got too high at the end of the concert, that i ended up blabbering rubbish to my frens. ahhh dieee! haha)

and to guitar 3! good job guys! we tried our best alr, i'm sure(:

to postwomen! we rock! ahhhh i'll miss playing postman like madddd!

to the excos! omg, we did awesome during tears in heaven! one song out of the many songs that i enjoyed best! at least all our practices are didn't go in vain(:

and to yu ping, shan and the rest of the excos, for all the effort and hard work put in to make this whole concert a success!

ahhh, now i miss every single moment of the concert :(

nvm, there's still the esplanade concert! so jiayou guitarist! can't wait to hear the alumni pieces as well!

haha njguit rocks!

& i heart njguit(:

on a side note, my cheeky classmates drew this:

and i like it alot! ( the drawing k!)

haha, if only.. (:

haha fine i shall update!

2008-07-07T22:30:00.002+08:00

2 weeks into term 3 alr =/ so freaking fast! tsktsk

it's youth day today! or rather youth day holiday off in-lieu. haha and guess wat? the COOL guitarists spent it in NJ! HAHA so much for it being a holiday for us. but it's okay, since it's for the upcoming concert, and hanging out with guitarists is always fun(: no better way to spend my last youth day hol as well! =D

can't really remember what happened in the past 2 weeks. hmm. highlight would be the getting back of common tests results? haha, fared relatively ok la, so i should be happy(: then, had lesson after lesson, day after day, a routine that keeps repeating -.- sian. i needa study! not mug btw. haha, i find myself beginning to dislike the word 'mug', which has more and more negative connotations. lol random.

anw, can't believe guitar concert is just this friday! O.O in just a mere 4 days time! omg! intensive practices this week! haha, will be going home super late on tues and wed, and i kinda look forward to it, haha weird me. really wish to savour every moment that is left of my time in the ensemble, cos i'm sure i will miss is soo soo much when i step down :( so must really cherish the time that's left.

anw, there was this one period (sometime last week) when i really felt that i failed in my role as an SL; the thought just sort of sinked into me at that moment, and i can't help but feel that i have let my members down :( it made me think whether i have really tried, whether i have put in my fullest effort coaching my members. and i guess i tried, but just not enough. can't believe i took 1 full year to realise this; when it's all already too late. but still, i'll continue to fulfill my duty as an SL as my term draws to an end, and not leave anymore regrets. i'm also grateful to my wonderful section 3 members for their encouragement and affirmation they gave me(: it makes all the difference, really. ty so much(:

was feeling kinda uptight today during sectionals, haha. was quite worried for guitar 3 as the ip2s just returned from obs, so i guess i came down a little to harsh on you all =/ ahh sorry! especially to wanghan, haha, for being so unsympathetic. i kept like saying 'why cannot play', ' i thought you said you would practice', until he gave a strong reply of 'can't you see that i'm trying!' wah, shocked me. upset me a little too. after that, i realised i was partly in the wrong, afterall he's already trying so hard, yet here i am rubbing salt into wound, and not even a word of encouragement. wat an SL man -.-nvm, at least i realised my mistake, and hope not to repeat in again. sorry again, guitar 3!

oh, congrats to exam group for achieving DISTINCTION!!! njguit rocks!

and as mentioned, guitar concert is this friday!!!!!! String Theory - Love Picaresque!!! hope it will be a SUCCESS. or rather, it WILL be a SUCCESS, yea it WILL. just give our all, and whatever it is, we'll have no regrets(:

ahh.. excited =D
But hold your breathe
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a guy like you is impossible to find
You're impossible to find

blog's back.. sch's reopening..

2008-06-22T22:18:00.003+08:00

blog is temporarily shut-down no more i guess. haha. it's too accessible alr la. tsktsk.

anw, this hols has been rather eventful(: almost half was devoted to guitar! but it's okay la(: then went out quite a lot too; outing with evelyn and yuanqing, outing with sarah and evelyn =D not to forget jennings' b'day! and guitar lunches, outings, and crapping times spent with guitar mates...<3

buttt, one thing that didn't proceed well was my completion of my hw, and mugging. as mentioned before, my productivity rate is pathetic. the latter is out of question needless to say, not when the former isn't even accomplished :((( sian, most unproductive holidays in terms of acads. i seroiusly must kick the awful habit of stoning mann!

anw, guitar concerts up next month! showcasing months and months of hard work :P hahaa

so sch's reopening tml :( getting back results i guess. ahh wish me luck =/

new term, new start. let it be good(:

失望，有时候也是一种幸福，因为有所期待所以才会失望。
因为有爱，才会有期待，所以纵使失望，也是一种幸福，虽然这种幸福有点痛。

随缘吧!

updates!

2008-06-08T22:18:00.002+08:00

haha omg people ( u know who u are :P ) whom i never knew bothered reading my blog actually confessed that they did! haha oh man, tag people, dun remain as mysterious readers! haha

ok so it's the end of the 2nd week of june hols alr! ahh wth so freaking fast! :( and i haven't started proper studying yet! even hw is becoming so difficult, in the sense that my productivity rate has dropped to an all-time low, not kidding. i can do one question and end up stoning no idea how many times in between. it's like your mind would subconciously drift off to other stuff, as you try to get yourself back to the stupid qn time and time again. and the result of this is that you will take so super long to finish a simple task that you finally get so frustrated and give up altogether. HAHA -.- currently i am at the frustrated state, seriously hope that my concentration improves, otherwise... i will get roasted la. haha

so this week has been rather fulfilling and exciting i would say =D

highlight was guitar camp (tues - thurs) of cos! first day was nth much, cos i miss the cleaning up part (haha went for some psycho test :P), but the bad thing was that i did not get my guitar maintained! ahh, still using the old strings and my guitar remains unpolished :( den second day was the fun one! had lotsa activities: chords enrichment, various guitar contests, bonding games, bbq, stayover etc. haha i was in food comm, and i think i failed la, cos i ordered too much food (even after much discussion with the esco) haha. in the end had quite a lot of leftovers =/ which had to trouble some guitarist to da-pao back home, while the remainders after that eventually ended up in the bin. haha damn wasteful, considering the high inflation rate + people are starving in other countries =/ haha guilty guilty! anw, stayed over at the chalet, with some others, had some random night activites den slept at 4 and woke up at 8. lol my record leh. next day checked out, den home sweet home, only to realise mingyang stayed near me -.- haha, but surprisingly, we never met each other in the vicinity before that! that was the first time! haha kinda strange man. so to sum it all up, guit camp 2008 was awesome! <3

den friday was the harmoc concert preview in sch! haha went together with charleen, and we pei-ed each other all the way from after lunch with caiyun (which is so very funny cos she was obsessed with some women magazine, and kept talking bout her dream guy :P) till after the concert ended! haha talk about one on one date eh :P anw, managed to occupy ourselves pretty well(: haha i lazy to blog, can read bout it on charleen's new blog! haha silly girl managed to find my blog and read it! and she then created a blog for herself! haha. anw, harmoc concert was good! good job to jamie, ngiam, nic lim. haha class harmoc people, went to support jamie in particular :P and guitarists for their cool medly with harmoc! well done people, and all the best for monday's performance!

very next day was band concert at vch! met up with class people for dinner at like 5.30, haha but was late cos went to buy flowers like super last minute XD haha anw after dinner at city hall, walked a considerably long distance to vch, and we were just on time, cos the band people were already starting to walk out. den the guys had to go all the way to the front, and we ended up sitting right in front of the percussion -.- haha the cymbals were erm powerfully strong eh :P anw the repertoire were not that classical-ly la, so it was quite enjoyable! the bad was not bad too, which makes the whole concert a success i guess. the stage band was funny and nice too! haha kudos to vanessa and daniel, class band people =D
lynette said they saw yp there during interval, when the girls went toilet! ahh i didn't :( was expecting him to be there la, afterall he was previously from band. so quite sad didn't see him la. hmm dunno if he saw me not though =/ and talking bout band concert, i didn't go for his one last year =/ come to think of it, should have gone sia. nvm, it's over.
talking bout concerts, i also went for aristal last fri! haha, it was at nus ucc, which i almost couldn't find my way. couldn't even find the bus interchange at clementi la. oh man, shi bai. haha. anw, met the girls there, and we got pretty good seats! haha went in on the dot again XD anw the dances were great! very graceful and intriguing! haha once again, well done to yihui and wendy, class dancers(:

ok that will be the end of my concert streak for this hols XD haha, and it's time to focus on our very own guit concert! jiayou guitarists!

haha so this week was pretty much filled with activities! well spent i must say! haha. next week must seriously chiong hw le. amy, u can do it! haha!

anw evelyn will be back tml, haha lucky her get to go overseas lo. outing soon(:

on a side note, now even the juniors know abt it! ahh >.<

it's the holidays! =D

2008-05-27T22:17:00.003+08:00

yay our 1 mth break has started!
haha dunno what to expect out of it, except for more guitar, outings, shopping and mugging? ahh can't really get myself in the mood for mugging actually. it's like, there's no push, motivation and i dunno wat else. haha. sian diao -.- and my tv is spolit! what luck! haha

anw, i think i'm starting to feel better. i think. but.. i dunno. it's hard, harder then i imagine it to be.

and they dun understand :( but i don't blame them, cos i dun understand it myself either.

they were at it today again. but at times like this, hard to take jokes. sorry if i over-reacted. haha

but am trying my best not to over-react...
cos i'm afraid,
in the midst of fighting back my feelings,
i'll end up hurting u :(
if anyone is to get hurt, i would rather it be me than u...

anw, the guitar exam group will be taking their exam on thurs! omg so near!! after all their practices for the past months, please please let them do well (:
ahh pretty scared for them =/
jiayou guitarists! <3

cts are over! (:

2008-05-22T22:13:00.003+08:00

dreaded CTS are over, over, over!!

haha, felt so short yet so long. and the papers were... ahh no comments -.-

so ok past few days were spent fruitfully trying to unwind myself from all the accumulated stress(: and as all would agree, a well-deserved break. thank god that my papers ended early, like on tues. if not, would have foregone the past 2 free days. haha

so tues after physics went for sushi buffet at cine's suki sushi for class outing. haha ate our fill there i guess; gotta make our money worth! den after lunch deliberated for so long on where to proceed next. haha the usual guy girl can't mix well thing again. could tell that the guys were like trying to please us by following where we wanted to go. but we, being girls, could hardly be bothered bout them :P we would rather shop around by ourselves in that sense. haha, and as expected, the guys gave up soon after :P

den on weds, went out on a date with stella! haha decided not to go for class outing cos din realy like sentosa :P haha. anyway, we went to sing out hearts out at kbox! haha, just had the sudden urge to sing :D enjoyed every second of it! haha and the dui chang for both girls to sing is damn cute and funny! so after singing till our voices were hoarse, we went shopping! for like the whole afternoon! haha though din buy anything, but it was still damn shuang(: and finally get to catch up with her after so long! haha should have another lap outing tgt with waileng also!

haha real sorry and paisey that i din wait for u ah evelyn!

today was ok as well. went library around noon. i was pretty bent on going i guess even though i went there aimlessly (as i did not have any book in mind) haha. so went there and browse for quite a while, before finally deciding on what to borrow. and as usual, all the popular books are on loan :( anw after that, went back to sch for junior's guit prac. helped out a little, but wasn't really much of a help la i find. i am more lost than they area :P but the song quien sera just gets people swaying! haha.

so post-ct period was great(: if only life could stay as carefree as now. ahhh, if only. nvm, just 6 more odd mths and we'll truely be free!

feeling hurt.

my mind is in a whirl now.
what you did today hurt me, like never before.
so much for being excited to see you after so long, why must you end my day like that :(
yea, so your diary has a big red heart on it. did you purposely let me see it?
and yea, you would rather talk to our guit girl juniors than talk to me. do u really dislike me?
and you would rather wait with zz who take diff bus from you den board the bus with me today. were you trying to tell me something? trying to tell me that you do not like me?
my gut feeling tells me that you are, as much as i want to deny it.
yet all of these could amount to nothing but mere thoughtless actions on your part.
ahh just how much i hate guessing your intentions :(

every now and then, i can't help but questioning myself whether i really like you, or is it jus another phase of my teenage life. although i think i do, but fact is i really don't know. but yet, i can't stop myself from liking you, as much as i want to. and i don't even have the courage to face you properly now. how i wish things weren't like that :(

and my gut feeling tells me again that you know about it. after being teased and all time and time again. and if it's true, it's either u dun believe it, or u are trying to reject me. somehow, after today, i believe it's the latter.

yea, it's not the first time that you hurt me so. and every single time, i wonder if u ever thought of how i would feel. but i guess u won't. and what sucks most is your attitude that always changes. at times, u treat me ok, yet at times, u treat me as though i'm non-existent. but then afterall, i guess i mean nothing to u. nothing. u din even bothered to wish me on my b'day, although i was hoping u would today, no matter how belated it will be. but u didn't. don't u noe that u are the one person that can make my day? all i hoped for was just 2 simple words from u, but u just had to forget. or maybe u just didn't noe ):

maybe this is not meant to be afterall. maybe it's just pure wishful thinking on my part. maybe it's time i reeled in my emotions. maybe.

and it's times like this, that make me hate myself more than i hate u.

if you can't hold on, let it go and come back in your heart...

perhaps i should just bury my emotions deep in my heart.

sweet 18 (:

2008-05-18T22:44:00.002+08:00

18 on the 18th! how cool :D

really thankful for all the well-wishes(: received the most this year (although it's not exactly a lor la), but still i feel very blessed! especially those who wished me on the dot! thx for just remembering, really(: so even though i didn't celebrate much today cos had to mug, i still felt very happy((: at least there are people out there who bothered about my existence (haha i sound emo). ok maybe not to that extreme, but at least i know i have a bunch of frens who will always be there(: love all of you loads <3 keep in touch always!

but then, you forgot :( which upset me a little.

haiz nvm, the others more than made up for it (:

haha and i make a groundbreaking discovery today!! unbelievable! hahahaa

so it's a memorable day all in all, and i'm 18! woots!

there can be miracles when you believe(:

2008-05-10T23:37:00.005+08:00

/EDIT

11/05/08
HAPPY B'DAY DEBBY AKA DA-BI ((:

HAPPY MOTHERS' DAY TOO <3

haha good to listen to such motivating and inspirational songs during this period of time :P and yes, common tests are in 4 days time. can't wait for it to be over, seriously. kinda sick and sian of studying alr :( i hope to do well (who doesn't la), but yet am afraid of hoping too much, to avoid disappointing myself even more. ahh well, we will see what happens.

anw, past 2 weeks came and past; nothing significant that happened, or rather nothing that my failing memory can remember, haha.

main reason of this post is do some publicity for njc guitar ensemble concert(:

there will be two concerts:

1) String Theory - Picaresque of Love
Venue: Ngee Ann Kongsi Performing Arts Theatre (NJC)
Date: 11 July 2008
Time: 7.00 pm
Price: $8.00

2) String Theory - Viaggio de Musica
Venue: Esplanade Recital Studio
Date: 24 July 2008
Time: 7.15 pm
Price: $16.00

apparently, if you purchase the esplanade concert ticket, you will get a compimentary entry to the in-house concert too! and in case if you are wondering, the focus of the 2 concerts will be different, so it will not the exact same thing you will be watching.

and btw, string theory, in our context, has nothing to do with physics!
what it really means:
as quoted from njguit's blog
"String Theory":
When the guitar plays, it speaks of emotions and stories from the one who sees and feels them."Theory" signifies the complexities of emotions, which is is subtlely conveyed through the strings of the guitar.
((:

yup, so that's our bi-annual concert. if you are interested, let me know, fast! (:

till then, i'm sure CT will be a breeze. haha ya right -.-

recap (:

2008-04-26T23:28:00.005+08:00

haha yes! finished up with physics spa today, and chem spa last week, both skill A. which means, no more spa for the rest of the year! haha, coolness :P not that i hate practical la, just just i hate having to sit for a practical test. chem was pretty standard, spent the whole night before memorisng though, but at least actual spa was nothing out of the ordinary, so hoepfully can score. but for physics, felt so unprepared even as i entered the examination hall O.O the preparation wasn't as straightforward as chem sad to say :( had to sort of study smart, and make predictions. but even still, the uncertainty principle still applies; can't know exactly every single detail. anyway, what i wanted to say was physics spa skill A wasn't that good. opps. a level 6 at least, please. so now that practical is over, it's 4 periods of tutorial per week per chem and physics subject! yayness -.- haha, but i prefer tutorial to spa though :P

hmm napfa sucks as usual. and now, i can't jump either. arghh. what's wrong with me man. and yea, i ran 2.4 for the second time last week, only to fail again. not only again, but failed worse. nvm, i shall continue to perservere, like what charleen is doing too(: and perhaps listen to jennings and listen to my ipod while running. haha, if i still fail, then i guess it's fated that i shall not pass my last napfa.

this week was the test-filled week. apart from physics spa, had quantum 1 test on mon too, as well as econs and maths on fri. got back quantum test, did quite ok la(: as for econs, felt kinda hopeless at answering the questions, and wasted cos could not apply what i tried to study the day before. ahhh heck. then maths was erm quite ok? ahh shan't say too fast, lest i don't do well. haha.

and ya, this week is also the last week of cip casp with zhenghua kids for my class :( i will miss my tutee sarah; she's really hardworking and turns up for every session! and yea, these 8 weeks spent with her has increased my level of patience greatly, serious. i am also more motivated now in terms of teaching them. and when i see that they sorta grasp the concept and stuff, it makes all the effort worth it(: although 8 weeks is short, but i guess even a little goes a long way, i hope. i guess most of my class people don't really see the point of the cip, which is sad :( but i don't blame them, cos the attendance of the kids was really poor, and it got worse as it progressed (except for my kid, and some others of cos). so i guess they got quite frustrated having to waste their time there doing nothing =/ but i am still glad they put in their best effort, one way or another, and hope that they really do appreciate that helping others is a joy (:

ok, so guitar is having exam break now for J2s and IP4s in preparations for CTs. ahh, which means i am home before sunset for most days! haha, but i will miss the guitarists, my beloved section mates, juniors, fellow J2-ers. haha. and which means i will also get to see whom i want to see less :(

oh man, what am i doing here >( i should be mugging for CT which will start next next next week, which is 3 weeks from now! ahh! and i barely started on my preparations, which is bad :S and yes, i need motivation! and more determination! haha, i must start studying! :P

went out today(: so did not do much work today. ahh heck.

dun know what else to blog about. lol.

anw, just wanted to say jiayou to all(: continue to hang in there and don't give up, in whatever situation u may be in! (:

haha have a nice song to share again.

超喜欢你 - 飞轮海

心跳快得很可怕
呼吸大到有气压
手心冒汗可以浇花(可以浇花)
生活变四格漫画
喜怒哀乐被放大
身不由己没有办法(没有办法)

怎么可以这样
怎么可以这样疯狂
怎么可以这样
怎么可以这样爱超出了想像

就算世界与我为敌
我超喜欢你
超喜欢你不能分离
我只相信这个真理
百无禁忌万夫莫敌
我超喜欢你
我慢慢不能清醒
终于不想清醒
根本不用清醒这个恶作剧

想要对你说的话
身体由已替我表达
一旦爱了不能作假(不能作假)
一度觉得很头大
怀疑细胞有偏差
可是爱了没有办法(没有办法)

想我超喜欢你
是我放在心里好久的秘密
我不敢告诉你
甚至没有勇气说服我自己
我问一问上帝
要怎么突破我们之间的距离
站在原地是友谊
往前一步又怕吓到你
我号称黄金右脚横冲直撞
天下无敌自由来去
怎么踏进这个禁区
马上败在你手里

a week in 5 points

2008-04-13T22:39:00.005+08:00

in an absolutely random order:

1) i failed my napfa -.- ahhhh wth la. failed 2.4 (expected it, afterall din really train much, but the horrid tears just came =/ haha guess i'm weak emotionally) and i actually failed situps too (was my last station, managed to D-ed the other 4, and when i realised i E-ed my situps, almost cried again -.- omg i am really really weak la, both physically and emotionally. bleagh.) and it doesn't help a single bit that _____ was being so unsympathetic and sacarstic to some extent la.
"it is obvious that you don't want to make this yout last 2.4" oh man, i will remember this sentence for life. not as though i din try, or that i purposely want to walk la; in fact, it was one of the best run i felt i had ran, but i still failed -.- stupid. and i seriously don't feel like retaking the whole thing next week :(
"of course. this is not the first time you are in NJ right?!"
wish me luck man.
but i resolve not to let this affect me anymore, emotionally(: haha

2) A for PW(: but wasn't exactly elated i guess. afterall, PW is such a pointless and unfair subject. ppl who dun deserve an A got A, while ppl who deserve an A din get A. anw, to say i dun care for the A would be hypocritical, so i am still glad i got it.

3) visited sarah at sgh together with praba today. had a hearty chat tgt after what seem a looonng time(: haha. glad she's feeling better now. but from her account, poor girl only got better these few days, can't imagine the pain/ suffering she actually went through for the past 3 weeks =/. hope the doctor can quickly come up with a diagnosis and treat her fast(: get well soon! oh ya, chatted with praba after what seem eons ago too. lol

4) guit's been fine, but maybe sth is still lacking from practices. sth that actually keeps the passion in guitar going. what is it? hmm...

5) the urgency of CT isn't getting to me. slacking is now my second nature. haha

alrights, i am off to slp.

i willed myself and took a step forward. but you seem nonchalent. but i still enjoyed your company, although it may mean nothing to you. and sharing my problems/feelings with you makes me feel better, although you did not offer me words of comfort. i am sure you don't know that even the tiniest bit of concern from you actually magnifies greatly inside me. show me more, won't you?

not a good weekend

2008-04-06T22:45:00.003+08:00

confused.

distracted.

sad.

emotional.

heartache.

tired.

series of emotions that built up on something that happened on fri morning.

just felt that i needed to pen it down, to get a clearer picture of it myself...

so i was taking the bus in the morning, the bus came slightly later than usual, but that's not the point. the moment i boarded the bus, i had this strong feeling that he would board the bus too. not sure why, but part of it was because i knew it was one of the buses he could take too, and that i saw him in the bus once. not the point again. so while on the bus, i still felt that he was going to board the bus, and even envisioned meeting him while alighting. and of course, i thought i was crazy, making such silly hallucinations. anw, while the bus was about to reach (i was sitting on the upper deck), i got up from my seat earlier than usual, as i was still thinking i could meet him (after thinking so much bout it happening during the journey). and guess what? i really saw him! (or at least i think i did) i caught a glimpse of his face from the corner of my eye while alighting, and after that, i didn't dare to look back to check if it was him. (but i think it's him, cos the particular image keeps replaying in my head). come to think of it, i should have at least turned to say hi or sth, but i didn't. guess it was because i couldn't believe it actually happened. i mean, even though i was sort of anticipating it, but the odds were like so so low, that the moment it happened, i didn't know what to do. moreover, i couldn't face, for reasons that i'm not sure of either. and this means so much because it was also the first time i actually had this strong yet weird feeling that he was going to board the bus. really. it actually made me feel stronger and deeper for you. yet on the other hand, it may be just a coincidence, and i am just thinking too much. i really dunno :(
but i cant deny that i like you, though your oblivious attitude just cont to hurt me :(

guess i let you get the best of me...

still dun feel any better =/ haiz

another thing that made me so moody this weekend is that i miss stella :( and waileng too. din see them for lap last 2 weeks, which is actually the only time we can actually meet up and catch up. haiz. at least i still see kellie in gp class, but we seldom talk too :( haiz.

and sarah is worrying/ scaring me :( and the only little thing i can do now is to give her support
to sarah low:
hey! i know u will not be reading this. but do stay strong k? i'm sure u will recover soon, and we will meet up soon as well(: take care girl!

woots!

2008-03-30T22:46:00.002+08:00

another week has past! haha

thurs had normal prac, and it was the last day of sch for yu fei :(
had a simple farewell for him, sang my hearts out with the song I'll be there for you
and coincidentally or not i dunno, ms ng actually treated us to 2 sets of sushi from sakae sushi! it was pretty timely considering that we only had a corrugated board like card as farewell gift for him (which was only last min!) haha, so yeah kinda cool! although he said he wasn't touched -.- haha, but we'll still miss him la. all the best in canada(:

sat was acjc's fun-o-rama!
went down after lap, and the weather was like hot. haha
met evelyn and yuanqing and renee (i think), crescent juniors. ok so i din know how to walk to ac (haha), so had to trouble the 3 of them to walk out to meet me! lol my sense of directions sucks bad :P anw, i was in a pretty stingy mood, and was very unwilling to spend. i spent 10 bucks only btw. haha. roamed around the various stalls, and the whole place was pretty packed. met a few familiar faces, saw aysha after soo long(: haha. and wanted to give sarah a surprise, but ended realising that the poor girl was hospitalised again :((( after giving her a call. ahh must take care and rest well!! din see emily, haha was thinking she may have ponned. so just talked and chat with evelyn and co. haha. overall the funfair was ok la.

guitar's ok so far, but our concert idea has been changing, changing and still changing. lol, still not finalised yet. has a rather unproductive online discussion last night which lasted 2 hrs! den spent quite a while doing up synopsis for just 3 song =/ meeting tml again to discuss further. hope everything wld fall in place tml. screw the uncertainty principle :P haha

hmm den i helped debby a little with her uni application. hope she gets wat she wants(:

ahh i am so random. lol

so i shall add another random song! haha

i think i'm silly to heart u :(

well-rested

2008-03-24T17:30:00.001+08:00

shall complete my post today cos com was damn laggg yesterday. haha

(yest)

had a pretty loonnng weekend(: haha. felt more relaxed than march holidays somehow; less chiong-y. lol

went out with family on fri! shopping! haha din buy anything la, but still feels good!
sat was great lap sales! haha was the stall holder of Toy Story Toy Mania! childhood memories man, haha. felt like a santa claus, giving away toys to the kids. hohoho! glad that the kids enjoyed themselves anw(:
din study much this weekend, but i'll take it that i'm resting for the loonng term ahead :P haha

okk, so sch's staring tml (yet again) =/ sian-ness.
btw the hall converted lecture theatre is kinda cool. 3 screens with proper tables and chairs. haha.

haiz.

haha, so that was yesterday.

now for today! haha

nth much la, jus that i'm home early again. ahh i miss having guit on mon :( feels weird coming home early. haha ok i'm weird.

blogger is damn lag now. sian

haiz

...and i don't know
how to be fine when i'm not
cos i don't know
how to make this feeling stop
just so you know
this feeling's taking control of me
and i can't help it...

cant face you

i'm tagged!

2008-03-15T00:16:00.001+08:00

first time i'm doing this since i started a blog. lol!

Instructions:

Remove 1 question from below, and add in your personal question, make it a total of 20 questions, then tag 8 people in your list, list them out at the end of this post. Notify them in their chat box that he/she has been tagged. Whoever does the tag will have blessings from all.

1. Have you given your first kiss away?
nope

2. If you were to be stranded on a desert island, who are the 3 blog buddies you would take with you? Why?
stella - she can gossip together with me and keep me company :P
yi hui - clever and can maximise our survial. haha
evelyn - we will go through thick and thin tgt!

3. Where is the place that you want to go the most?
Maybe Kenya? or Land of Utopia :P in my dreams.

4. If you can have 1 dream to come true, what would it be?
Be happy and carefree always(:

5. Do you believe in seeing a rainbow after the rain?
erm i guess so, but u can only see it if it shines immediately after the rain. science! haha

6. What are you afraid to lose the most now?
family, friends, conscience, mind

7. If you win $1 million, what would you do?
buy all that i wished to buy, but had no money to, haha. donate part of it to charitable organisations. give some to my parents. and save up the rest for rainy days. haha

8. If you meet someone that you love, would you confess to him/her?
doubt so =/ spending 4 years in a girls' school doesn't help either. haha.

9. List out 3 good points of the person who tagged you.
kind, responsible, cute :P

10.What are the requirements that you wish from your other half?
devoted, responsible, and loves me for who i am

11. Which type of person do you hate the most?
hypocrites. and ppl who does things without sparing a thought for others.

12. What is your ambition?
currently it is to be a psychologist (either clinical or child i think)
social worker maybe,as well
but not too sure that i will step in the field afterall

13. If you have faults, would you rather the people around you point out to you or would you rather they keep quiet?
erm, i would want them to point it out to me, but perhaps do it in front of me only. haha i get embarassed easily :P

14. What do you think is the most important thing in your life?
to spend each day without regret, and make decisions without looking back (still trying though)

15. Are you a shopaholic or not?
not really. hadn't shopped for a long while alr i realised. haha

16. If you have a chance. Which part of your character you would like to change?
erm, perhaps my wavering determination? i wanna be more strong-willed!

17. What makes you different?
erm, that i don't like scolding people, and probably can't either. lol.

18. Any weird habits or quirks?
like to shake my leg like alot. haha =/
and i tend to laugh when getting scolded by teachers (opps!)

19. How do you think Stella can change to be a better person except the qualities she mentioned in qns 17? (Its perfectly fine to leave it blank if you think he is perfect).
spread the laughter to everybody! haha

20. What would you be doing if you were not taking this quiz?
my mountain like pile of homework of course! haha

People i tagged: Evelyn, Yi Hui, Jennings, Debby, Clara (the active bloggers) haha

ok anyway,

crap la, sch's reopening soon :( but there's still like so much undone hw and stuff awaiting me. bleah. but i dun sense the pressure as yet. haha. hope i'm not screwed =/

guit this week was fun(: had guit induction, met up with juniors! haha, though i'm like anti-social. but nvm. and yuping said we improved as an ensemble!(: haha, like first time leh, praise us. haha

anw, i think i'm not doing enough for guitar somehow :( my priorities are off-balance. oh man :( i am such a slacker la. nvm, from this point in time, i will shall work doubly hard, and work doubly hard i will(: for njguit, for section3 and for... ok nvm(:

my current productivity rate is like 50% now. sian. can't concentrate on wateva that i'm doing, esp hw. no wonder i'm lagging like shit la. haha

haiz, getting distracted easily nowadays. after all the joke and all, i think i really like ______ leh. cos
1) i feel happy when i see him
2) i get distracted by him during prac
3) i try to find excuses to wait for him
4) i wish he wld sms me or talk to me online (which he doesn't la, unless when needed)
5) i think he's a nice guy.
and i think he noes la :( nvm, i shall pretend he doesn't, otherwise i'll be too embarrassed to face him. also, it's just one-sided on my part la. :'( sad. and maybe he's attached alr also la. haiz...

start of march :( start of hols(:

2008-03-09T00:11:00.002+08:00

haha, i realised the title of my posts always mark either the start or the end of the month! hmm..

okk so march hols are here. much awaited yet dreaded at the same time, if u know what i mean.

fri was an awesome day(:

- A for chi A's (:

- met up with some guit seniors, and i'm glad and happy for all of them! they did well(: chatted with debby for that short as i walked with her out of sch. ahhh i missss her, as well as all guit seniors!

- yi hui is damn smart and talented! oh man, jus proud of her (:

- band concert was cool!

nnn motivated i am(:

ohohoh feb is ending!

2008-02-23T22:34:00.004+08:00

haha dunno why, but time seems to be passing really really fast :(
this is bad man.

haven't updated in a pretty long time again.

and since i have stm, can only rmb having road run yest and class outing after that. haha
anw ended off road run baking in the sun -.- haha, din manage to finish under 30min afterall, though i missed by a bit i think, but ah well, still sry jamie and vanessa! so after road run, some of our class people went to plaza sing. grabbed lunch at food court (haha, guys' idea :P) den watched the movie juno, before splitting. it's a class outing, yet dun seem like a class outing actually, which i sad. but i guess it's our class thing ba =/

went down to st joseph home on tues. comm service interacting with the old folks there, organised by interact. den guitar was asked to perform and sing a few pieces for them. haha, so being an interactor and a guitarist, i decided that i shall go too! haha, anw played peng yoou, guan huai fang shi, and gong xi gong xi. was pretty messy and stuff, but overall it's was ok i guess. interacted with the elderly while they had lunch, learnt about some of their lives. den when we were about to leave, a mother asked some of us to play guit and sing for her daughter who was not well. it was really, really sad, esp when the mother cried. makes me feel jus how fortunate we are, yet we end up whining and complaining about stuff dat we shld be thankful abt =/

hmm talking to clara bout ahem is fun(: but cheer up gurl!
crapping with stella is fun too!
smsing kz is fun three! haha
k random.

let's talk bout studies. haha

feel kinda stressed in sch when u see others ahead of u and u are lagging behind, yet u do nth to catch up when u are at home. i shouldn't be comparing myself with others, but i always end up doing so. haha guess it's my nature. anw, it's a little better now as i learn how to relax more? lol

oh man, mental block again. haha

but i still feel time is passing way too fast.

slow down won't u :(

i think i like him, and i think he noes it =/ how?

it's the start of feb!

2008-02-02T23:48:00.000+08:00

haha the month of jan has ended. quite fast eh?

am blogging in the middle of the night again. lol, and as always, my mind seems to be not functioning very well. can't really link my thoughts coherently, haha, but i am still going to blog anyway :P

so lets see what random thoughts i have...

1) life as a J2 is not easy
ok like duh la, unless one is like marvin, then can't be compared

2) chem lectures are going at a crazy pace :S
doing organic chem now. 80+ reactions to memorise?! i dun care, mr wee must be scaring us :P

3) physics test on mon and maths test on tues
haha no comments

4) going down to crescent to teach juniors robotics on mon
thought it was quite fun. haha have to go read up more on the new nxt thingy. only bad thing is i'm wearing grey. can't blend in. haha

5) guitar this week is :( den :)
thurs was the so called concert-determining practice. the teachers were scheduled to hear us perform 2 pieces den decide if we are able to pull off the concert with our standard. oh man, thank god we pulled through that, but they are sitting in again in just a month's time! =/
also, whole ensemble got scolded the day before thurs, which was quite demoralising la. reduced our worth to almost nothing. but i guess part of what was being criticised is true la, so the exco reflected and took action the next day, and like wat yp said, it was as thought the ensemble had a whole makeover. we were much much better i'm sure (: well done and keep it up! haha

6) physics spa this (sat) morning
no comments again. haha, but i woke up at normal sch time la, deprive me off my sleep ahh.

7) i still have not paid my h3 withdrawal fees
haha, managed to catch mr tek (finally) in between periods to ask abt the payment. promise to pay next week! haha

8) CNY is coming
can't wait for the break.

9) i think i have acute short-term memory.

10) i am tired.
dunno why in the world am i still blogging. lol

ok i think my mind is shutting down alr. haha

ohh njguit :D
credits to tu!

okkk off to dreamland. haha

argh. i should really stop fantasizing =/ getting really distracted sometimes. come on amy, stop stop stop.

The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star

haiz. but for now, i noe ilu.

wheeee!

2008-01-20T23:25:00.000+08:00

it's yet another week!! haha, jus how time flies.

this week is kinda packed with activities!!

there's guitar orientation on thurs, soundtracked on fri, and LAP on sat! orientation was kinda messy la, cos had lack of manpower and stuff, so in the end didn't go entirely as planned. butt, it's heartening that 70+ juniors turned up! considering that it's quite close to the 90+ who signed up for orientation. ((: den went for soundtracked mainly to support juniors who were performing 3 songs (: haha they played very well, so did the others, so it was time well spent! haha den planned maths lessons (which were quite fun la) for LAP with stella and waileng! hard time controlling the kids man, haha.

haha, no time to blog in detail la. and can't think properly also. haha.

so bye :P

dilemma...

2008-01-12T23:42:00.000+08:00

sian... as i continue to deliberate over H3 or guitar... :(

H3 clashes with 2 out of 3 guitar practices, which sucks so bad. ahhh shouldn't have accepted it in the first place if i knew prac dates were going to change =/ but i couldn't have known of cos.

could jolly well just miss practice, but firstly i can't, and secondly, i don't wish to. apart from neglecting the responsibility i have as an SL and the probability that i will not be able to join some guitar events, the thought that i'll miss practices all the way until may, not forgetting all the fun, laughter, joy during practices, just depresses me. is it worth it to take the H3 then? those whom i asked advice from said it would probably be a waste to drop H3, and that i should adapt to the given situation. and the fact that the interest is there makes it much harder for me to decide. but i really dunno which to choose...

decide what's best for myself - that was what evelyn told me. sian, really don't want to make a decision that i'll regret (which is my sole new year resolution, LOL)

am currently more for dropping H3, at least i think i am, but not to the point whereby i'm 100% confirm dropping. hope to consult ms ng, and maybe she'll help shed some light like what yuping said.

till then, i shall remain un-decisionless. haha.

but somehow, deep down inside me, i believe it's the fond memories of guitar that will stay with me forever, and not H3 knowledge and grade, which will become meaningless/ be forgotten over time. in this case, it will be guitar i choose, over all else.

start of school

2008-01-05T23:54:00.000+08:00

so school officially started on wed. haha. i was kinda late on that day, cos the jam was super bad. there were 2 jams, 1 at near fairfield pri and sec sch that area, and another one along bukit timah road. sat in the bus for almost an hour la -.- and i didn't bring my ipod along to listen, so was damn stoned. haha, luckily the jam is only that bad on the first day of sch.

ok anw, lessons already started proper on the 1st day of school! ok maybe cos we are j2s and time is precious, but still, didn't expect it la. haha. all my subject teacher changed except for maths, which is still taught by Mr Song (: den had Mr Wee for chem, Mrs Lim for econs who's also our new CT, and lastly Mr Yong for physics (his famous Yong's 3 Laws of life!) haha x) and forgot to add Mr Ducro for GP. teachers this year are ok la, hope to work well with them (:

ok so all the teachers have been emphasising on just how much(ie little) time we have left, only 1 common test this year, prelims pushed forward... etc. sounds pretty scary and stuff, but somehow reality isn't sinking in? as in don't really feel the heat of it/ what the teachers feel. haha.

had cca carnival on fri. managed to get quite a few to sign up (: hopefully will have a decent intake for guitar this year (:

HAPPY NEW YEAR ((:

2008-01-01T15:59:00.000+08:00

yes, one year has passed again, and it's high time we welcome 2008!!

haha 2007 has been a great year for me i guess (: life in jc is not as bad/boring/stressful afterall! although there are times whereby u feel like giving up, but everything will work out somehow, one way or another. haha but of cos, next year gonna be much worse, since we are going to be jc2s, and going to ace our A levels :P and then, there comes the headache deciding our future propable career. haha. next year will be kinda hectic also, with guitar concert coming up, and h3! haha. see how it goes. hope things will turn out fine in the end! (:

new year = new resolutions. haha. not that i used to make any :P

so just simply not to do anything that i'll be regretful of in the future(:

nice and sweet(:

soo sch's reopening tml! looking foraward to it, yet dreading it at the same time. haha.

anw, hols have been rather eventful la (: so a nice end to 2007!

and once again, welcome 2008! ((:

天国的树 Tree of Heaven ((:

2007-12-30T00:20:00.000+08:00

just caught the last episode of 天国的树 on chn 56...

an awesome korean drama i must say! very touching :'(

ahh, can't really describe how i feel about it. haha but it's really nice (:

wld be better if i can watch the 10 episodes back to back, and not having an interval of a week between each. hmm shld hv watched it when i had the cd on hand! my aunt or uncle lent it to us some time back, but i thought it was boring so didn't watch it with my sis =/ haha guess it's partly bcos didnt hv the time of the world on had either. haha. nvm glad i caught it now anw!

once again, a lovely drama to watch :D

MERRY CHRISTMAS :D

2007-12-25T23:06:00.000+08:00

yup today's the dec 25th, and so MERRY X'MAS to everyone!

family gathering on christmas eve was fun (:

buuutt sch's reopening soon! :( good and bad, good and bad...

certain stuff to settle before enjoying the remnants of my hols
and certain priorities to set before stepping into the new year ahead

haha(:

cip for marina bay countdown

2007-12-23T23:00:00.000+08:00

ok so went to do some cip for the marina bay countdown on yest. haha signed up with it with stella. went down to esplanade for the briefing at 2. only then did we realise we had to fill up a rather big sphere or ball with wishes for the new year from the public. there will be 5000 of such spheres which will be fully released into the singapore river(i think) near marina area by the 31st, as part of a visual art thingy for the countdown. haha so we were supposed to go around asking the public to pen down their messages on this gigantic ball la. haha. so inconvenient man. took a bus down to tanglin area, and before we got to anyone, it rained -.- the rain kept coming on and off, which was super irritating, cos it causes the ink on the ball to smudge a little, and it goes onto our shirt. ok so they gave us a shirt la, no complains. haha. managed to get some people to fill up half the sphere i think, and the rest i filled up myself :P wishes for myself, for others, and also wished in the mentality of others. hehe. and of cos with some contributions from stella too! haha. not that we didn't try la, we did, but getting ppl to pen down their msg is difficult. haha. ended up strolling frrom bus stop to bus stop to get them to write, and most were willing since they have nothing better to do while waiting for the bus :P haha. stayed till bout 5 plus before reporting back. and we were quite hardworking and erm responsible la, cos the return box was filled with the deflated balloons when we got there alr la -.- haha. and yes, spent a tough time trying to deflat the balloon too. haha.

ok since i succeeded in connecting my phone to the com, i shall uplaod some pics!

The big gigantic sphere filled!

some (non-confidential :P) wishes i made!

a meaningful wish made by a member of the public! (hope i am not infringing any privacy rights =/)

and lastly me with the BBIIGGG ball!

and to sidetrack a little, i bought Backstreet Boys new album! (:

Interact bonding session

2007-12-21T16:00:00.000+08:00

before that...
HAPPY SWEET SEVENTEEN EMILY ONG! <3
though u won't be reading this :P

haha so had interact bonding session on wed. was actually quite reluctant to go la, cos dun really know anyone in interact. but still went in the end, partly because i was rather free and it would be really bad to bluff that i wasn't, and also since u minus 2 attendance if u fail to go without a valid reason. haha, and of cos also to bond and know more interact people la :P so now that it's over, i would say it was pretty fun la, worth going afterall(:

so went early in the morning at 9 to help out with the preparations of the games cos i was in club serv. anw while we waited for ppl here and there, and had to buy lunch to da-pao to pasir ris park since there are no shops there, only set off for the park at bout 11. lol. and so i was in charge of the so called rope game, where u had to pass the rope(which was ruffia string, lol) and the rubberband, with qinghui. and yes, that's a new fren i got to know of course. haha. anw prepared the water bombs with some others before seperating to do our own duties.

actually the turn out for the bonding session was rather sad la. supposed to have bout 30, in the end only 20 turned up -.- so ended up having 2 grps instead of 3 for the station games. so waited at the station damn long for them to turn up. and even before a group came, it started raining -.- lol, so had to find shelter. thank god the rain stopped soon after and we carried on with the game. haha, our game is actually pretty boring la, haha. not that we planned it anw :P sooo, left to meet up with the rest, and saw waileng and kellie in the toilet! haha, apparently waileng fell even before playing the games, so kellie accompanied her to wash up. haha, no wonder didn't see them with the groups. they are the 2 tt i sort of know pretty well la. haha.

after the games went playground to play. haha so childish :P anw, the playgrounds these days requires guts to play man. some of the items there are like scary! haha serious. it's amazing how kids can just play without being scared at all. hmm... their childhood will be much enriching than ours i'm sure. haha.

went back for bbq after that. that's when the bonding actually takes place la. next time we should jus have the bbq and do away with the games la. haha. so helped to bbq, and pinched food here and there. haha. knew more people again. haha. food was so-so, but not enough :P haha. wind was so strong that u literally needed an umbrella to block of the wind. -.- haha. oh ya, the horrible part was having to cross the grass to get to the bbq pit. cos of the rain earlier on, the whole place was flooded. not exactly flooded, but there was mud. and we practically sink your whole foot into mud - what's worse was that, cos i was wearing slippers, it was damn gooy the mud, which was like quicksand, and the slippers ended stuck in the mud. wah super gross! in the end everybody left to the toilet to wash up and the whole place was so muddy. haha. den left after helping to clear up the pit. overall, it was enjoyable la(: a bit better than expected heh.

sometimes, your attitude really hurts me. yr monotonous replies make me feels as though i've done something wrong. pls, dun do this to me anymore. i jus hope i'm being oversensitive. yea.

Volunteers' Appreciation Day

2007-12-17T16:11:00.000+08:00

attended the volunteers' appreciation cum christmas party organised by carecorner under the LAP scheme on the 15th. it was held at the singapore poly's guild club, sth along that line i think. haha. anw went with stella, and we did not get lost! thx to stella of cos ;P haha. the buffet spread was great, dianxin style. lol. and we played some 'icebreakers' game, and laughed alot. performance by kids too. enjoyed it i guess :) anw met some of the carecorner staff there, and when we exchanged greetings and stuff, they never fail to thank us for helping out. their sincere thanks made me realise that our help actually meant alot to them. i felt it weird because i never thought i was doing anything much. hmm... a little help goes a long way i guess. jus like how every single lap volunteer contributing his/her own part, bringing joy and laughter to the lap kids. anw received a simple thank you gift, a thank you card framed up made by one of the kids! ahh, touched! nth much, but it's enough(: looking forward to lap next year i guess!

oh ya, thx to stella and kellie for the gift! very nice! haha :D

badminton with evelyn last thurs was fun too! haha. :)

updates!

2007-12-12T16:05:00.000+08:00

haha so here i'm again blogging, which doesn't fall in my list of constructive things to do :P lol ok maybe not. beats rotting at home of cos. haha.

ok firstly, have to wish STELLA, HAPPY BIRTHDAY! hope u enjoyed yrself yest! cya soon!

anw guitar hol practices officially ended last fri! haha, not that i am exactly elated of cos. *ahem* but after the intensive yet not so intensive practices these past weeks, i guess we guitarists (those who have been constantly attending practices of cos) finally deserve a rest (: yea man! haha.

last week was the 7th international guitar festival! haha, went for the last and finale concert last sun, dec 9th, by Oscar Guzman. let me talk bout the price first. haha. the cheapest seats were at $20. and since we were students, we got a discount of $1. and due to further sponsorship by the National Arts Council i think, we got back a refund of $12. which means, we paid only 20-12-1 = $7 dollars for the ticket! hahahaha, cool eh!! and that's not the end! as we were seating seating on the elevated platform at the back, we could those below us very clearly, but had to strin our eyes trying to see his finger movements. so anw, the auditorium wasn't exactly full, and after the interval, we moved from the $20 seats to the more expensive ones in the front! haha, afterall, it's not occupied right? haha. and managed to get a better and clearer view of him playing! so the concert was pretty good overall. musicality and and techniques were awesome, but as what debby said, jus can't really appreciate the art of it. haha.

went to my cousin, alicia's 21st birthday celebrations yest! haha she just came back from brisbane, australia for summer holidays. had the normal bbq at pasir ris chalet with my other relatives. anw talking to her now feels weird cos she developed a slang! lol can't help but mimicking it as i speak to her. opps! =/ haha. anw from what she says, apparently studying overseas isn't all that glamorous afterall. she said all she does all day is study, maybe not exactly all day, but u get the point la. hmm hope life will be better for her next semester!

anw, it's raining and raining and raining in singapore all day. haha no tai yang gong gong to smile at me each morning. LOL jkjk.

it's the start of dec!!

2007-12-04T15:41:00.000+08:00

omg! can't believe there's only 1 mth left of holidays! 1 mth; 4 weeks; 29 days! argh!! so pathetic :( haha just can't help but emphasising it :P

anw stella, kellie, and jamie are back from their 2 weeks long stay in tianjin china! welcome back gurls! heard from stella that it was fun! haha still rmb seeing her on departure day and we took a photo tgt :) and she haven send me yet i realise! haha must ask her for it.

went for uncle's wedding dinner last sun. haha, was a western style dinner at mandarin oriental so it was pretty cool! the food was also kinda unique ehh. haha so not a bad experience (: so happy wedding to Royston and Cherlyn! though i don't know them very well la. haha. and they dated for 11 years o_O talk abt love that never fades ehh. haha may it stay that way then!

and yes, yuan qing left for china yest alr :( known her thru evelyn, her best pal too! enjoyed playing badminton and k-boxing with her. haha. anw hope to see her soon again (:

anw got offered a place in ntu h3 maths. went to submit the acceptance letter yest. hope i made a right decision though. den went off to library (again). lol cause jus went lib with evelyn and yq last thurs where they forced me to borrow shakespeare's macbeth book. dots ahh... haha. but had to go again to drop off my 2 other books which were due on that day so sun bian lor. anw i kinda felt erm wasted if i went to sch jus to submit the letter den return home. so go lib lo. haha. borrowed four other books i think. haha sch hol promotion so can borrow up to 8 books (: hope i can finish though. haha

ok off to do some ermm.... constructive stuff. hehe :P

back from hk (=

2007-11-25T22:13:00.000+08:00

haha back to good old singapore (= feels like home once again hehe. anyway hk and shenzhen was not bad, quite fun. went sightseeing and shopping alot. the weather was cold man, and the jacket was my life x) lol, singapore is jus too hot. haha. it was a well-spent holiday afterall (= lazy to blog la, so cut short. maybe will post some photos the next time. see how. hehe.

am trying to look for a job ehh. haha with evelyn and sarah. hoepfully can find no brain ones. lol x)

anw heard bout the news about mr loh. although i don't know him personally, but yea, the grieve is still there. it's a feeling that can't be described through words. and it makes u think of jus how unpredictable and fragile life is...

goodbye mr loh :(

some updates (=

2007-11-17T22:28:00.000+08:00

12/11: outing with evelyn <3
haha finally met up with her after dunno how long ((: o levels finally ended for her, glad that she survived thru this period(: haha so met her in bugis junction. went there from sch after guitar, and sort of got lost? haha, i seriously have no sense of direction man, went to researched on the best way to get there, and decided to take bus to newton mrt and take mrt down to bugis. (i even had to asked for directions to newton mrt from the bus stop!) wth man. anw, after reaching there, also had a tough time finding her. talking about getting lost man. zzz. haha! so went to eat at the new food court, ate omelette rice(: very nice! den went to watch bee movie with evelyn. haha she treated me! oh man x) wanted to pay her but she refused! haha, nvm next time i treat u too! bee movie was not bad, quite inspiring and hilarious, but too fictional le. haha 'not logical'. (yuping's famous line). if only bees could talk! haha. anw one line i rmb from the movie is about how is a bee life in any way inferior/ less impt than a man's. hmm... anw after that walked ard a little, before heading down to the library. borrowed two books. currently reading a chinese book evelyn recommended called wo zai yun shang ai shang ni by zhang shu xian. it's very nice(: not bad not bad, after not touching a chin novel for so long(: haha. so outing with her was fun(: chatted and caught up alot, esp after that incident, thank god everything's okay now! (:

15/11: kbox outing/ b'day celeb for kellie
went out with waileng and stella to cineleisure kbox. haha 2nd time there. rmb 2st time went with evelyn and yuanqing, haha! anw sang my hearts out la. company was great, songs were awesome too! haha. waited for kellie to come, den sang more with here again! sang eng songs, and i sang flying without wings! haha, finally appreciated the song now (yes i noe it's super old, but still, old songs are the best!). the lyrics are really meaningful, encompassing many aspects. guessed i didn't catch the meaning of it in the past, but at least now i do! haha. anw, sang a b'day song to kellie after that, and gave her a handmade card and our little piggy keychain! haha. walked ard after that, and went arcade! haha very long never play le. quite fun! glad tht kel enjoyed the outing! haha :D shld go out soon again!

12 14 16/11: guitar pracs
yup 3 solid days of guitar practices. currently our concept for next year's concert is already almost there, and i must say it's really cool! i really admire yuping for his determination and strive for perfection and originality, and i really pale in comparison with him. way to go pres! :D anw arguing with him is both fun and frustrating. haha x) anw, attendance for practices is not very good, and it brings down my spirit. haiz. but shall be optimistic bout it, after what debby said, and pray for the best next year! n missing guit prac next week :( jiayou guitar 3 ah!

haha quite an eventful week la. evelyn is currently fighting with me over who's busier. tsktsk. of cos me la, since she has jus ended o's and have the all the time to herself and herself! haha :P

oh ya chatting with stephen from children aid society. haiz miss gg down. anw, jus sent him a class pic since he requested one to remember. somehow, i feel a bit touched? the sort of feeling u get when u bring joy into others life that is. now after all that happened, i still wish we cld go down again. haiz. see how it goes.

leaving for hk on mon :D

CYCLING (haha, wat a memory)

2007-11-17T22:22:00.000+08:00

it's here bcos it's an experience which i never want to (and may not) forget :P

haha sarah low talked about gg to east coast park to cycle and that reminded me of a fateful yet not so fateful incident that happened on s23 class outing to sentosa some time back in oct. our class decided to cycle, and i, being a noob at cycling, was very unwilling but still foolishly agreed anyway. so went to to the bike shop to rent bicycles, and i was sort of sure that i will just end up malu-ing myself cos i will not be able to ride. (ok dun laugh k, haha). so i was like whining to my frens that i can't ride a bike, so as to prepare them for my incapability LOL. but that's not the point. miraculously, i actually could ride it! (actually, the prev time i sort of mastered the technique, but that was like a year ago, n i have never rode it again after that, so i thought i can't ride it anymore). so luckily i can la, otherwise... it wld be a different story le. haha. anw, off we go exploring sentosa. as i was a noob, i rode super slow. stopped here and there, esp the sharp turns. nth much, until we came to this steep downhill slope (didn't look steep to me then that is). so i just went down, n of cos i was clever enough to stop peddling. but i guess i underestimated the force of gravity (shld apply more of my physics knowledge eh?), cos i jus sped down so fast. zooomm! haha. and clever me was not so clever to brake fast enough n slow enough. i think i screamed, n apparently one of my classmate(kz) at the bottom of the slope stopped. and what happened after that was a total blur to me. i rammed into him (head on collsion, lol physics again i noe) and he fell, and i fell. and before i could react, pain shot up up left waist/ hip; my vision became blur, and my ears were blocked. omg, i thought i was gg to faint la, thank god i didn't otherwise sure yi chou wan nian (haha). anw, jamie and zac (and kz who wasn't injured, thank god again) helped me up, and glad that i was only hurt externally, no internal injuries x) so continued to cycle after that although i lost 99% of my confidence. haha, stopped quite a few times (much thx to zac and jamie who pei-ed me, esp jamie, u rock gurl! thx for being there with me thru it all :D) and suffered additional bruised to my leg -.- haha. anw, i crazily went down the slope again (my brain mus have been damaged man) but i survived it! haha, thx again to them for the advice! helped me alot ((:

so that was my horrible encounter with cycling :( kz said i may have died if he wasn't there, cos i would have probably ended up colliding with the lamp post upfront o_O haha. so thx for erm saving me? and of cos sorry again the fall! haha. wahh i think i maluated myself man. so horrible. haha. kena suaned by the guys, haha, but luckily they still not that bad la x)
so moral of the story: never to cycle again! haha, ok maybe not. guess i shld brush up on my cycling skills with sarah and emily, at least won't so malu :P haha.

haha dun laugh at me k? :P

luv ya, frens (:

2007-11-13T16:27:00.000+08:00

Westlife - Flying Without Wings

Everybody's looking for that something
One thing that makes it all complete
You find it in the strangest places
Places you never knew it could be

Some find it in the face of their children
Some find it in their lover's eyes
Who can deny the joy it brings
When you found that special thing
You're flying without wings

Some find it sharing every morning
Some in their solitary lives
You find it in the words of others
A simple line can make you laugh or cry

You find it in the deepest friendship
The kind you cherish all your life
And when you know how much that means
You've found that special thing
You're flying without wings

So impossible as they may seem
You've got to fight for every dream
'Cause who's to know
Which one you let go
Would have made you complete

Well, for me it's waking up beside you
To watch the sunrise on your face
To know that I can say I love you
In any given time or place
It's little things that only I know
Those are the things that make you mine

And it's like flying without wings
'Cause you're my special thing
I'm flying without wings

And you're the place my life begins
And you'll be where it ends
I'm flying without wings
And that's the joy you bring
I'm flying without wings

thoughts that can't be put into words.

2007-10-31T22:11:00.000+08:00

conflict with evelyn resolved (: glad everything turned out fine in the end! many thanks to stella and yuan qing for the encouragement and concern. we really appreciate it (: haha. and of cos, to evelyn for her faith in me (:

this incident have made me realise the importance of cherishing those around me. been reflecting alot, and i guess i wasn't a very good friend. haha =/ anw now i noe and i'll change (: and this is to all my treasured friends out there! (u noe who u are)

nevertheless, have been thinking alot lately. hmm...

thoughts whirling in my mind.

doubts seemed to be resurfacing every now and then .

yet i get reassured time and time again.

am confused.

but still trying.

foolish or not, we'll see...

sorry...

2007-10-21T23:40:00.000+08:00

TO EVELYN:

hey gurl. i noe it's my fault, and i regret every part of it :( i'm sorry for neglecting u the way i did; forgetting to msg u when i promised to, did not reply yr sms (which i thought i did, but doesn't matter now), failed to return yr miss call. worst of it all, i was oblivious to yr anger and displeasure towards me online =/ after that night, i really reflected and began to hate myself for being such a jerk, for taking u for granted, for jeopadising our friendship. although when i asked whether u were angry u said know, but somehow i know i had to let u down :( i guess u thought i didn't care, and u hit me straight in the heart. i actually thought i did, i guess i was wrong afterall. sorry for not being by yr side when u were needed me to :(

i dun now you are feeling now. dun even noe whether or not u wanna talk to me. it's ok that u are not replying my smses, i understand. but all i hope now is for you to give me one more chance and forgive me. n for u to concentrate on yr upcoming o levels depsite all that has happened. i wld hate myself forever if u screw up yr o's because of me. :( even now, i'm hurting badly inside.

seems like u locked me out of yr blog, once again, i understand. but pls, dun lock me out for too long. each passing day is driving a hole into the strong friendship bond we shared. n i dun want it to happen :( i treasure our friendship and i promise never to take u for granted ever again. all i need is yr trust in me once more.

n depsite all the fun tt u may think i had, i still constantly think abt u; am still hurting inside :(

awaiting yr forgiveness,
AMY

updates (:

2007-10-21T23:18:00.000+08:00

Ces't La Vie

nj's year end party! quite a last min decision to go, but it turned out that i made the right decision(: paid $5 for the concert which was really awesome! and of cos, received the $120 newurbanmale voucher, although i dunno what am i gg to do with it =/ haha. left halfway thru to grab a bite and helped out at guit stall. guit choc fountain rocks! and our secret chocolate recipe too! haha. turned out to be the only j1 there, but blended in quite well and chatted and crapped a lot with them! love u guys! thx for all the effort put in, u noe u rock! btw, wld like to apologise to ernest, although he doesnt read it but still, sorry! realised i that u were having a dry throat yet i still asked u to buy the choco stick :( sorry for being so insensitive :( so walked around with stella, yi hui (: and oh ya, guitarists are a helpful bunch of people man! hehe(: so reach home at bout 1115, very late but worth it(:

LAP

lap resumed yest. had loads of fun, cos it was all games! and got free food somemore. cos it was international chefs' day, and the chefs were blessing the lap kids with food, and we got blessed to of cos :P nice intalian cuisine!! haha, be jealous :P didnt regret joining lap after all!

Guitar Recital by Miguel Trapaga

Free concert at VCH. recommended to go for it by guit teacher, so jus went. haha. erm overall performance was not bad, considering that it was free :P lots of classical solo pieces that are pretty inspiring. but also a bit boring =/ haha. din regret gg afterall too!

oh man!! tml gg to get back results! bless me!

hi world (=

2007-10-14T23:02:00.000+08:00

ok i'm back!
haha, due to many people commenting my blog being locked and stuff
i have resolved the fault (: haha
dun be mistaken k. didn't mean to lock u all out =P haha

ok so it's been how long since i last posted?
haha dun noe and dun care.
promos are like over(:
class outing ((:
wr finalised and due coming tues (((:

and... more to come! (i hope)
haha

and ya, group's pw is finally on track!

oh and guitar breakfast outing tmr too!

haha(:

short & sweet eh?

don't bother reading

2007-09-16T23:33:00.000+08:00

just an emo post not worth your time.

i feel kinda lost right now. a bit emotional, a bit down, a bit stressed, a bit of i don't know what else
i've been moodswinging pretty much over this weekend my mind is like a total blank; devoid of happy thoughts, nothing to look forward to, just empty
it's like suddenly, i'll have this sudden urge to cry, and i have no idea why either
i feel as though i need to escape from this world, badly
it's as though there's nothing in this world worth living for
it's not to the extent that i will commit suicide or what, but still...
i don't wish to carry on this game of life anymore :(
oh man, can't believe i'm typing out such an emo post right now

anyway, if there's anything responsible for my dejection, it would be largely due to pw
yea, project work.
i am stoning in front of the com again not knowing where should i start
not the first time it has happened, but with each time, it gets even worsti
t makes me feel sucky inside, like i feel right now
i am sort of sick of doing pw already
if this carries on, i think i will breakdown.yea breakdown.
not that my group is not hardworking or what
just that we [i think] have no idea how to progress on from here
at least, i, for one, am lost.just feel like giving up on the project altogether
pw has drained any remnants of joy inside me and that little bit of strength and motivation that's left of me
and now, there's nothing else for me to hold on to; to spur me on

and so i asked myself
am i really that weak? [afterall, it's only pw, for godsake]
i thought i was strong, strong enough maintain optimism in face of setbacks
but i guess, i am wrong.

argh forget it ,amy.
move on.

up till now, i have no idea why am i typing all this crap.
i guess it's because i really need pour it all out
and perhaps after that, i will be ok.
yea, hopefully.

sometimes, i wonder how a penknife across the wrist would feel like
what is it like to glide it across the skin
what is it like for the blood to trickle down the open wound

and i remembered, once when i tried to use a little art knife to slice my skin
just lightly, a few times, for a puny bit of blood to ooze out
and i thought to myself,
why in the fucking world am i doing that
am i going crazy or what?

and now, as i think of it
i have the sudden urge to relieve it again
and perhaps, it will help.

fuck it. i hate myself.

promos and pw )=

2007-09-16T00:36:00.000+08:00

promos are coming right up next week!!! o h m y g o d!!! haha, can't believe time is passing so fast. it feels as though i have been transported from week after week without feeling as though i have done anything. nevermind that. gp is first up next wed, and it is one of my most feared subjects no doubt :( more so since i don't bother updating myself with the current affairs. and i just spent eons trying to come up with an essay plan which AK wants us to do. and she wants us to do up three. and i'm sadly only halfway through my 2nd. not sure if i want, or even have the mood and energy left to do the 3rd. why energy? because for each essay i have to read up a content booklet (kindly prepared by AK as well) and apply the content into my essay. and that take ages man. i really hope i do apply what i've done into the real exam. really praying hard that i will pass gp!

gp aside, another thing that has been constantly bugging me is pw. got back our 1st draft on friday. yea, it's like super late compared to other groups. and as though that wasn't bad enough, it seems as though our whole project has lost its focus. we totally or maybe partially forgot that we were supposed to feature the impact, NOT the technological change. and the bulk of our showcase is more on the technological change part, which sucks. apart from that, we were also unable to justify the impact well. which is a mojor task requirements. so throughout the whole report [which is uncompleted] there were lots of comments made, and they only got even worse towards the end. in fact, the last statement sums it all

"given the current state of your written report, you are going to miss the grade, badly"

greatest shock of all. and the word 'badly' didn't help either. very very demoralising la. yet, our ST said she wasn't worried for us [our report was sent to an external marker]

anw kept on thinking about pw, and when i finally decided to spend some time doing it, i end up stoning in front of the computer not knowing what to do. someone, help me! have this super bad feeling about pw right now. just hope things will turn out alright afterall.

Yellow Ribbon Project 2007

2007-09-02T23:47:00.000+08:00

The theme this year is GIVING BACK. today marks out the finale of our yfc event, mass candle lighting session. haha, actually it was a greatly modifed version. around 10 of the cast of the play Touched by Me, consisting of ex-offenders, lighted up together with us during the hourly performance. but it didn't matter la, at least it was done in front of an audience, and we managed to implement the event, though miniscule. and they thanked us((((:. greatest joy no doubt. and we also sold $1000 worth of candles. not bad, not bad.

joining yfc and choosing yellow ribbon as beneficiary of choice has indeed changed my perception of ex-offenders. in the past, i didn't really thought much of them, in the sense that i could not really comprehend the darkness they felt inside when the public outside discriminated them in one way or another. i mean, it does not concern me, and i have no dealings with offenders and ex-offenders of any sort, so why should i care? in fact, i somehow realise i would feel a little insecure and uneasy if i were to work together with an ex-offender. [yea, slap me for being narrow-minded, self-centred and just totally ignorant].

oh man, wouldn't this be what everyone would initially think of? i was in fact doubtful when fan jian proposed helping yellow ribbon, as i stereotyped the public to think the same way as me. hence, it was only after much persuasion [i think] before i finally grasped what ex-offenders really need - forgiveness and acceptance from us all. that's was the starting point for the change of my perception.

and now, after having worked with yellow ribbon and even helped them to raise funds, i totally see ex-offenders in a new light. we are all humans, offenders, ex-offenders and non-offenders alike. no one in this world is infailable; everyone is bound to make mistakes. but the distinguishing factor is whether we are willing to learn from our mistakes and repent. yet, the sole effort on the part of the ex-offenders is just not enough, for they require us to accept them back into society. just like how we forgive our friends or loved ones when they do wrong, we should extend this heart of forgiveness to those out there as well. they don't ask for much, just our willingness to forgive them. by doing this, we are helping to 'unlock the second prison', as evident from the tagline of the Yellow Ribbon Project. if you think more about it, it is just like how you would yearn for forgiveness from others when you commit mistakes. so if you expect that from others, shoudn't you do the same as well? i mean, don't unto to others what you don't want others to unto to you isn't it?

anw, that was what i thought about for the past month. but today, i gained another new insight (: that ex-offenders CAN do their part and contribute back into society. intially at the fair, when i first heard that the profits made from the sale of the yellow ribbon cookies and other gifts made by inmates were going to the Handicapp People's Association, i was puzzled. shouldn't the profits go to yellow ribbon instead, i thought to myself, afterall it is the yellow ribbon fair isnt it? i struggled with the question for the whole of the morning, until i went for the performance, a play Touched by You by inmates, did i finally understand. and i realised yet again what a myopic view i have. the cookies were made by inmates and sold to public to raise funds for the HPA => the inmates were trying to prove their worth and talents through funds raised for HPA => the inmates are able contribute back into society in their own way. oh man, i realised what an idiot and short-sighted person i have been :( i couldn't even catch such a simple link. argh!!! quite disappointed in myself :( but anw, to sum it all up, offenders and ex-offenders alike are willing to contribute back to society and help those less fortunate people, making them no less able than us. so would it be fair to to label them as the black sheep of society and the likes? i seriously would say no.

this journey has indeed been very inspirational and rewarding. learnt alot about ex-offenders and yellow ribbon, and much more about myself. i certainly didn't regret taking part in this, despite much time and effort put into it. however, there are still certain regrets pertaining to the whole project:
1) not involving the inmates in the designing and production of products for sales (as observed from the fair, products made by inmates can better bring out the cause)
2) did not carry out our mass candle lighting session together with the ribbon-in-a-heart structure ( but as i said, it's okay neverthess)
3) failing to compile a scrapbook for the inmates (hope to carry out after promos)

these are the main regrets i guess. but with regrets, come improvements. haha.

just realised i typed a really loooooooog post. oops! haha

would just like to end off with an extract from the book Giving Back

"If diamonds are not the coal will be, still a precious source of fuel is he"

and my appeal to all:

if you can help, so can they.

give yourself a chance to give them a chance.

happy teachers' day (:

2007-08-31T23:23:00.000+08:00

wishing all teachers a delightful teachers' day!
not all teachers deserve the praise, but still... at least they tried and are still trying. i mean, they would want us to do well, wouldn't they? i guess it's just that they are still finding the best way to teach, and we are still adapting to his/her teaching style. so just give them some more time la.
haha, i had better do what i preach!

anw, theme for nj tdc was retrospect. quite entertaining and interesting la. zac performed awesomely (yet again), and the 'live' interview of the winners of the best retrofied teachers were hilarious! and the skit was like super duper cool! serious! kudos to council(: so after concert guitar people met for our little surprise performance. turn out was like bad la, with only about 10 people :( haha, anw, we decided to change song last min to accidentally in love. so tried out a little then left for atrium, where ALL the teachers were. oh man, they were having buffet lunch there, and it was filled with teachers, students and random people. haha, and when we first saw them, we were freaked out! but anw, we still performed and wished guit teachers and since it was in public, the other teachers as well a happy teachers' day. i hope they were that little touched(:

after all that, went back crescent with charlene(: haha, had a nice chat with her on the bus. and glad she met her friends back in crescent! went to find sarah, shuzhen, evelyn they all and found that they were together with ms ng. haha, seeing her again just felt weird. i guess we didn't really bonded back in sec3 and 4, which is sad:( and we didn't get any teachers' day present, and i realised i did not even wish her! argh, what a horrible student i am!!!:(:(:( had better change this nonchalent attitude of mine.

stayed for a while, then evelyn went back henry park. haha, been years since i last went back, BUT only bcos all my teachers have retired. haha. then went out with shuzhen, sarah and nandhu. ate fish&co. almost got cheated of this big freeze drink, but luckily I was sharp enough to redeem it! haha! den went plaza sing to shop, with my guitar. haha, dun laugh! den left at ard 5. tired out.

currently there is this bad problem in my class. apparently, there is this big gap between some of the guys and the girls. seems like we are interacting lesser and lesser. and actually, the guys actually tried to do something to mend this relationship, such as initiating to sit together with us during lecture. however, it seems like we are not responding well and recognising their efforts. haha, and jamie feels we need to do something about it. hmm, i guess she's right. afterall we are a class, one class. and not one class of girls and one class of boys. but the thing is we have nothing in common to talk about :( or rather, maybe it's just me? :( ahhh. nvm, i shall try to interact more with them. dun wanna be labelled as antisocial that's for sure. haha. hope the situation will improve!

oh and i think i am gg to get the click five album! all the songs are pretty cool! haha!

oh man, promos are in 2 weeks time! the thought of it jus freaks me out!! :( mus really force myself to sit down and study, otherwise...

not giving up

2007-08-15T23:13:00.000+08:00

we are bound to experience setbacks
we are bound to meet with failures
and we will no doubt feel sad, discouraged, demoralised.
however, we are definitely not gonna just stagnate there
if we ourselves don't help ourselves, no one else will.
so what if we screwed up?
so what if we end up making mistakes that were uncalled for?
and so what if all we got was laughter from others?
does that seal our fate?
yea, we accept that we are under par, but we DON'T just stop and do nothing.
we have to just put in that little more effort and work even harder to acheive what we set out to acheive.
i know it's difficult, and we know it takes more than just effort.
but we can surely be able to summon up the determination, perservarance and willpower aren't we?
come on, let's work together and make everything a success.
i have faith in us, and we should all have faith in ourselves.
nothing is too difficult to achieve as long as we put our heart and soul to it.

when all you gotta keep is strong, move along, move along like i know you do

strive on we will, strive on we must!

dun be sad, cos it just ain't worth it (:

and this applies to everyone out there.

Seniors' Farewell

2007-08-10T22:39:00.000+08:00

8th August 2007

a special, memorable, sad day i'll never forget.
To all Njguit seniors out there:
Thank you for what you've have done to mould the ensemble into the awesome state it is in right now! we're gonna miss you! hope you'd enjoyed your time spent in guitar cos we certainly enjoyed time spent with you (= we luv u, seniors!!!

believe it or not, this is the best farewell i've attended so far. i really hoped our seniors enjoyed the farewell, cos i certainly did. all the hard work put into preparing for it was worth it no matter what. now i'm real sad that they are leaving, never to see them again in guitar :'( the thought that they were leaving for good only struck me at the end of the farewell, that i almost cried :'( how i wish time would come to a standstill! How i wish i could turn back time! oh man, i'll miss them like siao la! hope they do come back and visit us sometime, anytime. but even if they don't, they are just to hard to forget!

I love NJGUIT and I love u SENIORS!
oh btw, i realised tt i'm not giving my best to guitar :( seems like i'm putting very little effort. but after seniors' farewell, i hv decided tt i must do more more MORE!!! haha, so i'm going to put my heart and soul into guitar from now!!! i hope i put my words into action manz...

overwhelmed...

2007-08-05T00:27:00.000+08:00

oh man, it's yet one of those down moments whereby i feel as though i can't take it anymore :( it started building up this week, where the thought of giving up just filled my head. going home at 8+ everyday is no joke. i guess i am exhuasted from it all. seniors' farewell next wed = lots of things to settle. my gifts are unbought yet, video undone yet, performance unpractised yet. and yet, i feel as though i'm not doing much about it. hopefully the juniors can complete much of the video by mon =/ otherwise... i don't want to think how... guitar is pretty much stressful now i guess, coupled with school work. it seems as though i have minimal time to study at all. if practices are thrice a week until 7+ everyday i think i'll break down sooner of later :'( my studies will just die cause i have never and most probably will not stay past 12 to study. just to tiring anf unhealthy. in a dilemna now. guitar or studies? to be able to strike a balance between both would be ideal, but seems like my studies are taking a step down. which is bad. i want, no it's need, to be promoted!!! worst of it all, guitar is not the only factor of consideration. there's still interact and yfc to be taken into consideration. i guess that's where i failed, horribly. i just hope nothing will go terribly wrong with these.

finally i'm back!

2007-07-26T23:04:00.000+08:00

haha, i took so long to finally decide that i shall update my blog, since i'm like stoning online, besides blog hopping... haha, so here i am (=

anyway, i will not recap all that has happened in the past months as there is really alot to recap about, plus i have short-term memory. when i say short-term, i really mean SHORT. haha, seems like i only bother to remember important school stuff plus other random stuff. others just seem to slipped out of my mind subconciously.

got back CT results. better/met my expectations, so i'm a happy gurl (= haha, 'cos didn't really have time to mug during the Junes holidays, so am pretty glad that i didn't do badly for any subject. except for maybe GP, which i got a D. my worst subject, but i am actually satisfied that i even passed la, so it's ok (=

as for guitar, i got into the exco ((= proud guitar 3 sectional leader to be (((= oh man ((= haha, passed down from yuen yi and wei jun (: thought i would get guitar 2 initially, but nvm, i'm still a happy gurl (= [haha, again i know, but who cares (=] so had a few exco meetings already, to discuss about various stuff. yup. oh and there were a few disappointments for all =( first was that the yfc concert was cancelled =( bleagh, all hard work went down the drain. sad la. then just when we were halfway through preparations for iperform, the whole thing was called off again! are we unlucky or are we unlucky?! haha, nvm, shan't be to sad (= so we are now practising for open day. hope it would be a success! yea man! and preparations for senior farewell are underway (=

yfc updates. had 3 booth cum street sales to date. earned about $6000 i think, not too sure. and good news is that we got the ycm grant! additional $3000 to cover cost. which means our cost are TOTALLY covered with a surplus of about $600 from the sedd funding (= haha, BUUTTT we are still left with about $ooo+ candles which have to be sold within a month. this is crazy man. =( and we are currently booth-less now. have to look for other alternatives to sell off the candles. maybe in school? haha if so, must buy hor! =P

weijun's b'day! haha, happy b'day! sorry for not doing much =/ but i sincerely wish u all the best (= hope that you were that little touched at the surprise during prac (=

Crescent Speech Day! it's this sat! can't wait to go back and meet all the folks again! feel kind of ingrateful, 'cos i only went back twice since i left =/ oh man... so much for cherishing my alma mateur as quoted in the school song. haha, anw am looking forward to saturday! it's nolstagia yet again...

btw, i am currently listening to this sentimental touching song introduced by classmate kevin. and it's real nice. old songs are the best.

it's Love, Me by Collin Raye

CTs are over (=

2007-06-28T16:33:00.000+08:00

haha common tests are finally over (= or rather almost la. left chinese next tues. hmm so needless to say, cts were hard, very hard. haha. just hope can pass lor =/ sianz... haha... but still very happy that it is finailly over! btw, i am relieving my past time by playing maple story (but got bored after i lvled, lol!) and audition (quite cool!) again! lol, dun say i'm childish =P

so when cts officially ends, it's enrichment week! been looking forward to that pretty long manz. haha, BUTTTT i actually lost my card! or rather, i thought i lost it. only to find out that i was scaring myself as we handed up to ct alr (= haha, can't believe that i'm THAT absent-minded X)

yfc updates: WAHHHH, next week is gonna to be VERY VERY HECTIC. haha. have to package 2500 candles budgeted by next saturday. and we are only left with 3 days cos the cups are only arriving earliest on wed!! haha, must choing thru everything. cos we are setting up booth sales at suntec city and united square simultaneously on 7th and 8th July. haiz, quite confused now. haha

oh and our mentor treated us again (((((:

haha amy's a happy gurl (((: she guessed rightly again (((=

besides that, mentor is cool and all!! very helpful, so thank god (((=

updates (=

2007-06-13T22:23:00.000+08:00

haha. it's been more than a week since my last update. let's see, i stopped at the day before guit camp yea? haha so i shall recap from there i guess. lots of momorable stuff that i definitely do not wanna forget (=

5th - 6th June

as mentioned earlier, GUITAR CAMP! had loads of fun! the training, the games, the food were fabulous. haha. chatted and played the guit alot. and slept at like 3+ which is my record la. haha. overall had a absolutely enjoyable time (=

NJC GUITAR ENSEMBLE <3

12th-13th June

LAP camp. interact care corner scheme at admiralty. haha had loads of fun too! first day was basically games at NJ. played quite a lot with the kids [group2]! so fun! haha. den 2nd day was zoo trip! oh man! was so tired out! haha. they whole day ask me for hp and cam one. den of cos i paranoid la. haha. but all is fine and well at the end (= it was an enojoyable and refreshing experience all and all. it's really amazing just how by planning this camp we can give them so much happiness. after reading through some of the reflections they wrote, how much they enjoyed themselves and thanked us for it, i was really touched. it really makes everything worth it. all the time [not tt i sacrificed much though =/], the effort all worth it. at the end of it all, we may be tired and exhausted and perhaps guilty [for not studying =/], but still... we made the kids happy (= the two days of enjoyment may be short, but who noes, some of them may remember it for life. so i'm glad i the camp was a success!

so yup, these are some of the highlights of the two weeks (= studying is not everything peeps! haha although i am getting a little paranoid now that CT is a week or so away =/ *screams*

YFC is quite ok now, settled much stuff and met mentor! haha!
oh had guit this week and next week! but din go this week due to commitments elsewhere. lol sounds to bad =/ BUTTT i will go next week (= preparing for a performance for another YFC group. lol sounds ironic. haha.

hope my studying goes well now!

class cip / guit camp <3

2007-06-04T22:58:00.000+08:00

Just came back from CIP at children's aid society today as part our my class CIP. yea, so conducted our 'dance workshop' and we taught them NJ's High School Musical mass dance! lol... and i forgotten part or rather most of it. to think i ask ppl to go learn the dance [am CIP rep btw] when i myself did not do so! haha... bad example... nvm i shall learn it up the next time (= anw, the kids there are super hyper?! kinda difficult to teach them properly. haha. but there are a nice/ cute bunch of kids to be with (= I LOVE CHILDREN!!! taught them almost till the end of the dance, but of cos, don't think they will remember much of it the next week. haha. but nvm.

wah, am like exhausted now =/

tml's guit camp! haha... looking forward to all the fun and excitement!! day time in school and afternoon at aloha chalet! YAY <3

get over you i can't. BLEAGH =/

busy life. ha.

2007-06-01T23:37:00.000+08:00

yup. life's as busy as it is. haha. sian...

anw if u're free, pls help me do this survey thx (=

http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.aspx?sm=QMge8nBJAl1LWOPPni0lvQ%3d%3d

sTrEsS

2007-05-24T22:36:00.000+08:00

yea too many things on my mind currently

feel kinda lost and helpless all of a sudden )=

the hols are nothing to rejoice over, with CT and stuff to worry abt

sianzz

moodswinging damn badly now

haiz...

ahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!

but it will pass, i'm sure it will (=

stay strong i will
stay strong i must

when nth goes yr way,
u feel like giving up
tt's exactly how i feel now.
damn it.

SWEET SEVENTEEN (=

2007-05-18T22:39:00.000+08:00

haha my birthday today (=
many thanks to all who wished me!
debby, evelyn, jamie, kellie and many more!
haha am a happy gurl today (=

today had guitar recital too!
haha, quite messy la but was a success nevertheless
njc junior ensemle <3>
luving guitar more and more now
more so because i getting to know more juniors!! whee!!

jc life is really, really hectic manz! haven't really had a good rest yet and reaching home at 8+ everyday is really no joke =/ thank god that next week is slack due to SISC. hehe. but then... still have to come back to sch for extra lessons and projects. talking abt projects, we are given so many that i have lost count! omg! va sucks la. hols are here soon, but not that i expect much rest out of it though...

can't believe i still can't get over him! ahhh!

happiness ((=

2007-04-24T22:46:00.000+08:00

yup proud to say that WE DID IT
NJ GUITAR ENSEMBLE - GOLD WITH HONOURS !!! (19/04/07)
haha, we rocked (=
everybody made this possible, every single one of us (=
glad that i took the initiative and that bit of courage to join syf
and i certainly did not regret it!
at least all the late nights staying back to practice, all the numb and peeling fingertips, all the motivational speeches by pres and SLs, just all the sacrifice was worth it!!
now that syf is over, i kinda miss it now )= feels as though my life is very empty now, no more staying back late, no more chatting to guitar mates. the feeling is really bad )= no wonder i end up feeling out of place and emo most of the time. haha.
anw did the video thingy today (= think mine was the worse of all though )= haha, just hope this will surprise/ touch the pres, conductor and SLs. and on a lighter note, there's guitar tml!! yay!!

so last sat was the yfc interview. i guess we were overly prepared, as we expected to be led into a room and do a formal presentation. thus, we did up cue cards and practised rehearsing for many times, haha. thank god we didn't do ppt slides, otherwise it would be even more awkward. so it was a mass interview held at the the hall whereby many groups were being interviewed at the same time. i guess we did ok (= initially the judges weren't really interested for they gave us the impression that they were so bored =/ lol, however, after a while, they became more interested in our project, and i guess they were amazed at how close we were working with yellow ribbon, as well as how deep we have analyzed the project. so all in all, i heard them saying 'good', haha. so am waiting for good news!!

it sucks that u don't even bother...

almost there...

2007-04-11T22:38:00.000+08:00

wow, haven't been here for around two weeks. had been pretty much busy these past few days. syf is just next week, exactly one week more man. anyway today's practice was very much fruitful and productive. we played our best and managed to sway with the music (= what the president said today also stirred up my emotions. she said that it is not all about getting the silver , gold or gold w/ honours. it is about doing the composer justice by giving our best. this made me think about how necessary it is to have such a competition. hmm... she also gave us a lot of encouragement and motivation, and i was sort of touched la. hopefully everyone in guitar ensemble feel the same way as i do and give off their very best in this last stretch. we can do it, as long as we believe in ourselves. and we will do it as a whole ensemble.

submitted the yfc proposal just last week. put in a lot of time and effort into that as well. prays hard that we get selected, otherwise all our effort will go down the drain! no idea when the results will be out though, but am hoping for the best!

hectic

2007-03-24T23:38:00.000+08:00

and so 1 week of sch has come and past. the week was pretty much slack, as the whole week was filled with only lectures. and we have like a lot of free periods now and then cos we don't offer that particular subject. this made me very sian, and my class would then proceed to the grandstand, which has no doubt become our favorite hangout. haha. then we would either mug, play ball or just stone. yea, this went on for the whole week la. so i was like damn sian of school. lol, anyway next week lessons start proper which means must chiong tutorial already =/ SIAN MANZ

guitar syf coming up on the 19th april. kind of nervous. went singapore conference hall for the rehearsal today. reached there at like 6 and ended practising out in the open cause the tuning room was not available. imagine one bunch of people sitting down and playing the guitar. haha! anyway, we played pretty well i guess. after which, at 8.30, we proceeded to the actual venue for the actual rehearsal. but we played like below standard =( seems like the change of venue made us more nervous i think. and i played quite badly too, sad la...

next week will be even busier i guess. guitar practice 4 times a week. and tutorials to catch up on. and doing maths tutorials makes me want to puke blood manz...

the song bridge over troubled water is currently stuck in my head right now. lol.

school reopens =(

2007-03-19T22:42:00.000+08:00

term 2 officially starts today, and although this week is still rather slack, mostly lectures all the way, but i am already preparing myself mentally for the added workload that is to come soon. i sound really paranoid and kiasu, but can't be helped. and today i gave myself a big fright, 'cause the first thing i reached school i learned that quite a few people had started on their chem revision alr! and i was like 'OMG', 'cause i haven't started on any yet. then that was not the worse. as i checked the timetable for the week, i realised that chem 2nd lecture is like tml, and i panicked of course. considering that i reach home at home today, there would be like no time to study. so in the end, i borrowed notes from yihui and started mugging. haha, quite funny of course, but i am like that la. anw, only during chem lecture then the lecturer announced that chem test is postponed to thursday. tsktsk la. make me worried for nothing. haha, but also good la. sian, kind of regret not studying during the hols =/ amy, it's time to snap back to reality!

had guitar today and today's practice was a little different. our mentor [mr toh] brought in a professor or something to assess our syf pieces. however, it became more of a lecture on the history of guitar or something. like he started of talking about how we performed, then veered into his own world. haha, sounds funny eh? but anyway he shared with us some guitar techniques and tips as well, so all in all it was a good exposure (= and he mentioned something and scared most of us. about us getting trigger fingers [where the nerves in our finger are spoilt or something] if we wash our hands after practice or something. then everyone was like 0_0 !!! haha, even the teacher who plays guitar as well got a shock! haha.

sch tml again, and the one thing to look forward to is the early dismmisal (=

SCREWED

2007-03-17T23:42:00.000+08:00

SCREWED SCREWED SCREWED SCREWED SCREWED
SCREWED SCREWED SCREWED SCREWED SCREWED

great. i screwed up the exam. horribly. but i've only myslef to blame.

and it's the stars that lie to you...

exhausted!

2007-03-16T22:29:00.000+08:00

the past few days had been rather tiring manz. tuesday went for that workshop, then went back and forth from cathay and plaza singapura like dunno how many times to find stuff. wed went for guitar practice, then went orchard to shop for syf costumes, didn't manage to find any suitable though. yest[thurs] went for guitar bbq at east coast, and reached home at like 11.30. record for me manz... haha. so am super tired now.

today went from guitar again[ yes and know]. haha. can't be helped, we need the practice badly. went straight home after that and stoned for quite a while. just didn't feel liek doing anything. haha. then practiced guitar for about 1 1/2 hours to prepare for the exam, which is like tomorrow! and i still feel so unprepared! i only practised twice this week, once on tues and once today. so u can roughly estimate my proficiency level. haha. going to practise tml too though, but highly doubt it will be of any effect. so all in all, i need all the luck i can get tml manz. as in seriously, please let the examiners choose the easy pieces for me to play!! *prays damn hard* sigh... will leave all to fate. just hope won't fail the exam =/

all i need tomorrow is luck. badly.

rushed...

2007-03-12T22:22:00.000+08:00

heard something from my junior(evelyn) today. she said that if you walk during mass run (in crescent) you will get a demerit + 20 push-ups! omg la! i never fail to walk during mass run when i was still in crescent. if this 'rule' was implemented a year earlier, i foresee that i will end up doing detention. haha.

went school for guitar practice today. practice until left fingertips are hurting and my right fingernail got chipped! haha, all in all had an enjoyable time during practice, excluding finger pain though. looking forward to next practice!

was almost late today, or rather i think i was 5 minutes late. lol. was like looking at my watch every minute or so in the bus, fearing that i would be late. in fact, i clearly thought i would be late, as i kept on noticing how jammed it was in front and how many red lights there were. thus, my whole journey was spent worrying. however, what's unusual is that i took about the same time to reach school as compared to other days, about 40 min. yet on other normal days, the thought of being late never struck me. partly because i usually end up asleep in the bus on school days where school starts at 7.40. this reminds me of what my chinese teacher once said. he said that when you are in a rush for time, the bus would seem to move very slowly, even though it may be travelling at normal speed. yet on the other hand, if you are not rushing for time, the bus would be moving at its usual speed. this sort of struck me. 'cos i never once thought of it that way. so in the bus, i was thinking to myself why was i worrying so much, when at the end i would still reach on time? why was i feeling all anxious and uneasy? hmm, i tried to take my mind off how fast the bus was travelling and just enjoy the scenery or watch tv mobile or sleep, but i failed. why is it that we can't stop ourselves from feeling rushed? i guess it's because we all have datelines to meet.

relating back to reality, it's all the same. everyday, we rush through life, for fear of lack of time. in fact, time is never enough. but why can't we just put the time factor out of our minds and just enjoy what we are doing? why must we always be binded by the time constraints put to us? if there wasn't the time factor, would the outcomes be the same as before, or would it be different? if it is the same, why must we rush through it and miss out the enjoyment of it all?

will these questions ever be answered?

SIAN

2007-03-11T21:51:00.000+08:00

today's another boring day for me. haiz... realised that there aren't any nice tv programmes to watch nowadays, or is it because tv no longer interest me? hmm, not that i care anyway. spent majority of the time today doing tutorials and more tutorials, however, i did not even complete any! that's how PRODUCTIVE i am man. haha. have to buck up, otherwise the homework pile will never disappear. lots of catching up to do this hols i guess.

i realise i have nothing much to blog about :( haha, SIAN la!

no matter how hard i try, it's to no avail...

sad :(

2007-03-11T00:47:00.000+08:00

oh ya, forgot to mention. my class is not going to stay as a class :( damn sad man... so much for being happy about everyone being able to stay in nj :( sian man... worst of it all, it was like totally unexpected. so the first thing on fri when we checked the classes, i was like shocked to hear that some people were posted out! omg la! haiz... gonna miss them, especially stella!

why must things turn all this way?

tiredd...

2007-03-10T22:34:00.000+08:00

just changed to the new google account. the features are quite cool i must say, haha. anyway, just had this sudden motivation to do all this stuff, as in change my blog and stuff. decided to abandon my previous blog because i have no reason why either. lol. hopefully i will have the time to update and maintain this blog and not let it rot away again. haha. it always happen to my previous blog and i always end up forgetting the most basic things - my username! omg la! that's how OFTEN i update my blog man. haha.

feeling pretty sian nowadays... no idea why :( it's like there's something lacking in my life, and i just can't find what's missing... if this goes on, i am pretty sure i am gonna need a psychiatrist soon man! omg! i think i'm being much too paranoid once again... haha. but i hope that this sianess will go away soon, if not i think i will die man.

jc life so far has been pretty much slack. but after the holidays, the pace is going to be much more hectic i guess, as forewarned by many of our teachers. maybe the busy life hectic will leave me with no more time to think and think about my empty life, and yea, just numb myself. will it? i guess i will get the answer in a week's time.

as mentioned, school hols are here again. lol. mon, wed, fri have guitar practice from 9 to 1. something to look forward to no doubt. but then, haiz, made a wrong mistake which probably irritated/upset some people. sorry! haha, should seriously never try that again. once bitten, twice shy! and guit bbq on thurs, no idea if i should go. see first bah.

blogging is fun, yet boring. paradoxical eh? haha

sometimes it's a facade that i put on...